Category: Everything else

Actions and reactions drive our happiness. If our actions are aligned to our purpose and values (i.e. if the what, why and how are in place), we give ourselves a good shot at happiness through what we do. However, our actions make up a smaller part (10%?) of our life experiences when compared with our reactions. A big part of life is just dealing with stuff that happens to us. Some of this is driven by our actions and some of it is just random.

To deal with all this “stuff,” the single best happiness increasing skill is the ability to keep perspective. So, if things didn’t work out this week, this is just a reminder that the setback for you was, perhaps, a miracle for someone else.

What goes around does come around and your turn will come, too. And now, for the best part of today’s post – a quote I came across –

“The sinking of the titanic was a miracle to the lobsters in the kitchen.”

Indeed it was. What a great lesson in perspective.

I began writing on this blog at a time when I felt my insecurities were taking over my ability to be happy. I was an unhappy 19 year old. I had just seen an initiative of mine criticized and had taken the criticism a touch too personally. In many ways, this blog is my version of “Dealing with insecurities for dummies.”

Insecurities cause envy and self-doubt – two emotions that rouse the worst in us. These emotions make dealing with insecurities complicated because these emotions often complement each other. And, there is no easy way of dealing with envy or self doubt. The other challenge is finding a way to avoid the instinct that causes both these emotions to surface. This instinct is drawing unnecessary comparisons with people around you. The more you compare, the more envy you feel and the more you question your own self-worth. This is a vicious cycle.

The only solution I’ve found to get past this is a certain degree of selfishness and self absorption. This degree of self absorption enables us to relentlessly focus on ourselves and our own process. It fills our thinking-time with interesting challenges around issues we face rather than around what everyone around us is doing.

I am of the view that you don’t ever get rid of your demons. But, you do learn to keep them at bay. So, I don’t think you ever truly get rid of insecurities. You just learn to accept their presence, work with them, and consistently let your best self shine through. On some days, this is pretty hard to do. On those days, I just need more reminders that I am doing what I am doing for a reason and I have got to be patient to see it through.

Is there ever any guarantee that what we do will work? Absolutely not. That’s why we’ve got to work hard on our own process. If it doesn’t work this time, we’ll need to figure it out by next time. At the end of the day, our approach needs to be customized to our personality. And, that can only come with self awareness. Radical self awareness is easier said than done, of course. And, it is bloody hard to get to radical self-awareness when you are dealing with bouts of self-doubt. That’s why I recommend trying a bit of selfishness and focus on our selves first.

I’ve found that detour to help.

I woke up this morning asking myself – “So, what is something profound you’re going to share as your learning for the day?”

Wrong question, I soon realized. I’ve learned never to aim for profound. Instead, I find it is better to just focus on something meaningful I’ve learnt. There are a couple of reasons this works better.

First, profound for whom? There are very few concepts that might seem profound for everyone. Instead of attempting to please everyone, just write for two people – yourself and one other person who you know reads your blog.

Next, it is hard to be authentic if you are working too hard to position yourself. I am no multi-million dollar entrepreneur or venture capitalist imparting pearls of wisdom. I am just a twenty something graduate student sharing what I learnt or observe. I’m sure this doesn’t work for many. It works for a few. That’s fine – they know what they’re signing up for.

Finally, if you put too much pressure on yourself, it becomes easy to just not show up. That’s part of the magic, too.

So, a note for this week – just show up, be authentic, and do what you can with what you have where you are. And, who knows.. every once in a while, you might just outdo yourself.

Companies that rely on winning based on product leadership require top quality R&D labs. These R&D labs allow them to test out various ideas and bring the best of them to the market. The most innovative companies do a great job with sustaining high quality R&D wings. Failure in the market can be very expensive and, thus, not investing enough in research can cost companies who want to be innovative. Just ask any of the pharmaceutical giants.

So, let’s apply this to our own company – Me, Inc. How can we go about creating our own R&D labs?

The essence of research and development is to think of an idea that you believe will add a lot of value down the line, to find the cheapest and most effective way to test it and then to execute.

So, let’s say you believe learning how to build a mobile app will add to your future earning potential. The R&D based approach would be to pick up a book or two on app development, to invest in the necessary app development tools, and to just get started building an app.

In some ways, every side project you choose to spend your time on is an example of an R&D lab. The big questions, then, are – are you intentionally thinking about the ideas you want to test/the skills you want to learn? And, are you building an R&D infrastructure that allows you to test different kinds of ideas/skills?

The great companies of tomorrow will be built off today’s weekend research projects…

It has been a long while since I’ve put up a “Building Help2Grow.org” thanks to an implicit choice we made a couple of months back. When we founded Help2Grow.org in January this year, we had many plans on the marketing front – an active blog to tell our story, an active Facebook page to engage the community, an active Twitter feed, a great monthly newsletter etc. Over time, these initiatives have fallen off the rails. The central reason for this is the fact that we’ve had our fair share of struggles over the past few months. These struggles have been on 3 fronts –

1. A distributed team that wasn’t getting its act together. Thanks to a variety of reasons, we seemed to be struggling to get our act together. On the one hand, after 6 months of attempting to run a charity in addition to all our jobs and commitments, the honeymoon phase was definitely over. On the other, a bunch of us faced disruption in our schedules with fairly valid reasons such as cross continental re-locations. We were struggling though.  We seemed to have lost our mojo and our momentum and we needed to gain it back.

2. Troubles with partners. We had a couple of partner situations that were just not working out. We needed to step back and take stock.

3. Legal hurdles. Getting a charity fully functional in India is no easy feat. Despite a solid track record, we were unable to get enough movement on the required legal certificates to receive tax exemption. That’s an ongoing struggle. We had also decided we’d apply for a 501c3 registration in the US as nearly half the team is currently based in the states. All in all, there were a few legal hurdles to jump.

These issues led to a complete loss of momentum. We were soon showing up to our calls but not really getting things done. The frustration began to show, people began to drop from calls, and not preparing for calls became the norm for a couple of months in between. And, somehow, our actions aimed to get the momentum back just didn’t seem to be working. That’s when we stumbled onto 2 insights –

1. We needed a real core team that would keep each other accountable. When we started out, we had a team of 14. Over time, this came down to a more manageable group of 7-8 folks who were actually getting things done. We needed to make this official and begin to create accountability within the team again. So, we did just that. We still keep our whole team copied on emails but we have a separate group on Whatsapp for the core group and we’ve begun expecting each other to show up prepared. A culture of accountability goes a long way.

2. Good managers give their team members clarity on what needs to be done. This was entirely my failing. Over time, I’d assumed that we’d just respond to the sheer magnitude of work by just getting things done. That clearly didn’t happen. Why, I wasn’t doing anything myself. We needed someone to break work down and give people clarity on what to do. I had completely neglected this. So, we spent all of last call aligning on the major projects and priorities and broke up these projects down to granular tasks so we had absolute clarity on what needed to be done. Voila – things have begun moving again.

Through all of these changes, there was no movement on marketing and I took it up as my responsibility. We needed to re-think our initial goals. Over this time, we had implicitly decided not to do any marketing and I thought I’d just make that official and continue with inaction. Hopefully, I’ve made our reasons apparent. But, in case I haven’t, it is a combination of two reasons –
– We have very limited bandwidth. This bandwidth needs to be used carefully so we’re delivering value to our partners who, in turn, can impact the lives of the kids we hope to impact
– We want to be authentic about the problems we’re facing. At this point, we just aren’t at the operational level we desire. And, we need to work hard to fix our ship before we share stories of success. The good news is that we’re putting in the work and should have more to share shortly.

Does this mean you’re not going to hear from Help2Grow.org? Absolutely not. We will continue to share stories as and when possible. It will just not be a key priority. We’re going to work hard to fix the leaks in our ship and deliver value to the kids and organizations we aim to serve. More to follow soon – just forgive us for the occasional silences. We’ll just plan to make it worth it when you do hear from us.

And here’s hoping our actions make a difference..

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This blog post has also been posted on the Help2Grow.org blog.

Someone recently shared that people stuck in poverty have a lower IQ score on average than those better off. However, this IQ score goes up almost as soon as they know they’re out of their current financial condition. Researchers have posited that this is because a large portion of their mental resources are taken up by questions around requirements at the low end of Maslow’s pyramid. Constantly wondering whether there will be a next meal, whether the roof will hold up for the night or whether they’ll be able to survive their current illness doesn’t leave much mental space for much else.

So, if you don’t need to worry about any survival necessities, you ought to know that you’ve just been gifted a whole bunch of IQ points. These IQ points enable us to think long term, build for the future and work towards causes bigger than ourselves.

Or, we can just choose to focus on the latest minor setback, the sarcastic comment on Facebook or our envy at an acquaintance’s relative short-term success.

We can also choose to give thanks for the 30 odd IQ points we gained out of sheer good fortune of being born in the right place or focus on all those things we don’t have.

Completely our choice.

I have a tried and tested formula for every time I feel overwhelmed. The typical situation begins a long to-do list where everything seems both urgent and important on first glance. It becomes clear that this list of tasks isn’t likely to get done in the time period I have in mind. And bam! I’ve hit that wall. I realized this as I spent 30 minutes this morning attempting to muster enough inspiration for a blog post.

My instinct, when I feel stuck, is to motor through. Get the post out, build momentum, get to work. But, after 30 minutes of frustration, it was time to trigger the process to get unstuck.
The first step? Sleep.

Yup, right when I feel I have no time to get the things I want done, the step that works first is an hour or so of sleep. Somehow, when I wake up, I find it much easier to break through that wall. It ends up revolving around answers to 2 questions –

1. What REALLY matters?
2. What does a successful day/week/period of time look like? What are 3-5 things I’d like to have done?

These questions pointed to a bunch of decisions this morning. Some things needed to be postponed while others needed to be moved up the priority list as they were the chief source of stress. That clarity was all I needed. And, it came from stepping out of the “zone” at a time when it felt like doing so went against all natural instinct.

I guess many of the best decisions we make tend to be counter-intuitive. That’s what makes life tough and interesting…

Every employee of the Ritz Carlton has $2,000 to resolve a guest issue without asking for permission. That is unusual. Almost every hotel on the planet likely has a value around customer service. How many actually walk the talk?

That said, the Ritz Carlton model would not be sustainable if it didn’t have the systems to back up this unusual policy. If the Ritz Carlton’s systems were a mess, they could easily find themselves spending tens of thousands of dollars every day resolving guest issues.

It is this combination of unusual and sustainable that makes the Ritz Carlton special.

This idea has numerous applications. Let’s think of personal competitive advantage. If every peer in our company works 60 hours per week, it would be unusual to work 100 hours. But, is it sustainable? How many burned weekends before you realize your productivity has completely dropped? The more important question that it raises is – what are you doing wrong? If everyone else can get their work done in time, why do you need to work so much more?

Too often, companies and marketers go for unusual. Giving every viewer on Oprah a car definitely falls under that category. But, if it isn’t sustainable, it is unlikely to be a source of much advantage. Gimmicks like that rely on luck.

Consistent success requires process.

We buy basic groceries at two local supermarkets near our place – CVS and Jewel Osco. You’d think supermarkets would have nailed the basic grocery experience. But, it turns out that the egg buying experience is very different in these places.  Let’s begin by taking a look at the egg cartons.

CVS goes for a cheap looking soft plastic carton while Jewel Osco packages its eggs in a tougher cardboard carton. My guess is that someone in CVS’ packaging teams decided to save a few hundred thousand dollars in egg packaging by going cheap. Was that the real cost, though? Let’s look at the egg shopping experience at CVS –

1. Find where the eggs are and pick a box.
2. Carefully open the box and check every egg to see if one is broken.
3. Every 1 out of 3 times, find a broken egg and repeat process with another new box.
4. Take the egg to the cash register. Invariably, the lady at the register will take another look at the eggs as it is a known problem.
5. Check out and walk out.
6. If, somehow, you forgot to check if your eggs are broken, well, be prepared to find yourself working hard to clean a smelly refrigerator.

The experience at Jewel Osco is simply ‘pick up a carton and leave’. Scarred by my experiences with CVS, I often open up the carton to make sure nothing is broken. But, that’s a waste of time. The cartons just work.

The only reason I shop at CVS right now is because it is a 1 minute walk from home vs. 15 minutes at Jewel Osco. Should there come a day when a Jewel Osco store is closer by, I’ll definitely be shopping there. In some ways, that’s the real cost of the trade-off decision CVS made.

It is worth thinking about the corners we cut in our lives too. We are always quick to see the gains and identify some costs on the surface. For example, I’m sure the CVS team thought of the inconvenience caused to customers. However, I’m not sure they really understand how they’re making what should be an easy, frictionless experience into an annoying one. Simple choices can have big consequences for your users.

Beware cutting corners on your products. When you do, make sure you really understand the trade-offs.

Seth Godin, as is his wont, had a thought-provoking post on choosing those who choose you a few days back. He wrote –

“Pity the foolish 8-year-old boy who gives a kid just a year older the power to make his day. In that moment, being picked for the kickball team is the most important thing in the world, and his dreams are in the hands of a kid with a demonstrated history of poor judgment. If you were walking by the playground and he yelled, “Hey Mister! Wanna be on our team?” it would (I hope) mean little to you. You’re no longer willing to be judged by a kid who can’t even ride a bike.”

I’ve had a few recent experiences that have only reinforced this idea. The amount of unhappiness created by idea of not getting picked is incredible. So, the best way to reduce its influence in your life is to just take initiative regularly and pick yourself. There are going to be many many areas where you will be engaged in the picking process anyway – finding that important first client, looking for your next job, recruiting high quality team members to join your team etc. These processes will have enough reasons for you to experience a few ups and downs anyway.

So, when you can avoid it, avoid it. Create your own basketball team, your own event, your own project team and just have fun running with it. It doesn’t mean it’ll work any better. It just means you’ll focus on the game and quit worrying about whether you’ll be picked.

Seth goes on to say – “The ultimate privilege is to pick ourselves.” My only addition would be that it isn’t just a privilege, it is a necessity.