Category: Everything else

Our daughter has been attempting to alternate between turning, crawling and sitting over the past few weeks. That means she often loses control and, occasionally, “falls” – i.e. hits her head on the floor with more force than she might expect.

While it likely hurts a bit, we’ve noticed that her first reaction is not to cry. Instead, it is to look at us. She generally has a shocked look that seems to say – “Something weird just happened. How am I supposed to feel about this?”

On our part, we’ve made it a point to smile, cheer and clap every time she falls.

So, when this happened a few days back, we did the same even though we muttered to each other – “Man, that must have hurt her.” But, voila, she saw our smiles and claps and had a thrilled look on her face too.

It was a powerful moment for me as two important lessons hit me. First, so much of early parenting is about the interaction effect between the parents and the child. It is like an improv act with very little dialog as we all play off each other.

Of course, this principle doesn’t just apply to parents but to the teams we work in as well.

And, second, so much of how we react to situations is based on subconscious assumptions of how we’re supposed to feel. The moment we let go of that and give ourselves the time to respond, magic happens.

Much to learn from kids, we have.

There are two steps to practicing appreciation –

1. Noticing something that deserves appreciation
2. Appreciating it

We’re not taught how to appreciate things. We generally pick it up from someone around us who does it. It is not that we don’t want to appreciate things. Many of us, at some level, understand that appreciation matters, But, the act of doing so feels awkward. We are stopped by questions like – “Will this make this situation awkward?,” “Will I sound unauthentic?”

Here’s the issue – most people go through their lives feeling little appreciation. We live in an age with a lot of material wealth but little mental well being. It would be foolish to blame it all on a lack of appreciation but a few consistent good words go a long way in lifting people’s minds and spirits. Appreciation is the grease that helps families and teams function better. It has the potential to make days and change life.

The biggest challenge with practicing it is simply doing it. Appreciate something today. Then, do it again tomorrow. As you keep doing it, you’ll notice a lot more that deserves appreciation. And, suddenly, you’ll realize that virtually everything around you deserves a word of genuine appreciation.

The best part about this practice is that there are two beautiful side effects. First, as you learn to genuinely appreciate others, you learn to appreciate yourself. The act of doing so builds our humanity and, somehow, makes us feel better about ourselves.

And, second, the act of doing so fills us with gratitude because it helps us not take things for granted. Trading expectations with appreciation is one of the surest signs of the presence of happiness.

Corporations report measurement errors to their customers all the time. Here’s a simple two step test to determine the difference between measurement errors and management issues –

1. If the number of times you’ve unearthed measurement errors in your business is <=2, they are likely just errors.
2. If you’ve found more than 2 errors and if the errors repeatedly favor you over the customer, then they aren’t measurement errors. We are looking at management issues that are likely manifesting themselves in everything you do.

For example, I’ve been a Comcast subscriber for 13 months now. I’ve called or live chatted with customer service to report measurement errors 9 times in 6 of the 13 months. And, each time, the error involved Comcast charging me more than they should have. Hence, not a measurement error but a management issue.

As a customer, keep a lookout for repeated measurement errors that count against you. Such businesses have management issues that are going to pop up in the future as well.

And, as a builder of products and services, if you find yourself dealing with repeated measurement errors, take a long, hard look at the incentives and culture you’ve created.

One way to live your life is to always feel owed.

How does that work? Well, you likely did something for somebody and they never returned paid you back. But, to add insult to injury, they don’t even acknowledge it much these days.

That ungrateful wretch. You’ll show them when you get a chance.

Of course, you probably way overestimated the impact of what you did.

But, that’s not even point.

Expectations are toxic. And, carrying these expectations with you just increases the amount of toxic material in your brain. It doesn’t just mess with how you think, it also messes with every other thought in your system.

Nobody owes you anything. You do things because they either make you feel better or because they appeal to some inner sense of purpose. So, if you’re walking around feeling owed, you’re inviting unhappiness.

Every once a while, it’s worth asking – “When do you feel owed? What does it take for me to feel owed?” And, find ways to take the time to shed all those expectations you are carrying around. Life feels lighter and better.

Being creative often involves being intellectual middlemen.

In an interesting study,  Kellogg school of Management Professors Jones, Mukherjee, Stringer and Uzzi analyzed 17.9 million research papers for novelty by assessing how much they’d been cited and what combination of sources they’d cited. They found that – the highest-impact science is primarily grounded in exceptionally conventional combinations of prior work yet simultaneously features an intrusion of unusual combinations.

Charles Duhigg interviewed Brian Uzzi for his book “Smarter, Faster, Better” and Uzzi said – “A lot of the people we think of as exceptionally creative are essentially intellectual middlemen.” That is, “They’ve learned how to transfer knowledge between different industries or groups. They’ve seen a lot of different people attack the same problems in different settings, and so they know which kinds of ideas are more likely to work.”

So, how do we become better at being intellectual middlemen? The abstract of the paper offers a clue – Novel combinations of prior work are rare, yet teams are 37.7% more likely than solo authors to insert novel combinations into familiar knowledge domains.

Successful iPad games these days are things of beauty. They are beautifully designed and engineered for one purpose – to get you addicted.

It makes sense, of course. That’s how game developers make money. You either get addicted enough to watch ads for other games or you make purchases within the app.

If you’ve ever tried one of these games, you learn very quickly that promising yourself to limit game time isn’t a winning strategy. You might be logical. But, the game developers don’t speak to your logical brain. Instead, they speak to your lizard brain. And, generally, the lizard brain wins.

It turns out that the easiest strategy to limit game time is to delete the game.

Just as the easiest strategy to eat healthy is to remove unhealthy food. Or, just as the better strategy to watch less Netflix is to cancel your subscription.

As a general rule, if you’re going into battle, choose conditions that suit you.

In May 1913, five San Francisco entrepreneurs (a banker, a wood and coal dealer, a bookkeeper, a lawyer and a miner) invested $100 each to set up the first commercial-scale liquid bleach factory in the United States, on the east side of the San Francisco Bay. The firm was first called the Electro-Alkaline Company and ran into difficult times during the first 3 years.

So, investor William Murray took over the company as General Manager. His wife, Annie Murray, saw the potential in a less-concentrated liquid bleach for home use. She built customer demand by giving away 15-ounce sample bottles at the family’s grocery store in downtown Oakland. The product was called Clorox and the rest, as they say, is history.

The birth of Clorox marked a century of dominance by consumer packaged goods companies. They made their way into our houses by selling us their soaps, tissues and the like, and sponsoring serials in our living room (“soap” operas). Their formula was –

1. Invest heavily in advertising to build the product’s brand and make customers want to buy it
2. Invest in retailer relationships so customers can find the product easily when they go shopping

In last week’s “Notes by Ada” note (/essay?), I argue, that we’re reaching the point where these giants are beginning to unravel. The signs are out there – multiple reports about their struggles, disappointing earnings and attempts to buy each other and consolidate. It is no surprise. The formula, if there was one, for succeeding in e-commerce is –

1. Sell direct to consumers online and cut out all middle-people and costs
2. Choose to either build a brand using smart digital advertising or build a subscription based relationship

This is another example of “old world” companies facing the chasm and finding the gap between them and technology firms (they’re stuck trying to figure out the cloud while tech firms are implementing machine learning) harder and harder to bridge.

If this piques your interest, the longer version is on Medium or LinkedIn.

When you first touch the water as you’re starting a swim, it generally feels cold. The first time it touches your back typically sends a shiver down your spine. Ah – the discomfort.

Do you take the plunge? Or not?

The plunge alone won’t suffice, of course. You’ll still feel cold.

Instead, the best approach is to jump in and swim. A few strokes later, the water feels good and you feel comfortable. If it still feels cold, a few more strokes will do the trick.

This is the point when you wonder why you spent time wondering if you did take the plunge. It feels comfortable. And, as you swim more, it begins to feel great.

Of course, this is analogous to every great growth experience.

We introduce ourselves all the time – especially when we meet people for the first time. These introductions can be pretty high stakes because many folks make their minds about us from our introduction. This is especially so if you are presenting to executives and investors who are used to be making quick judgments about people.

So, here are 3 tips that help with delivering great introductions.

1. Start with why. Most self introductions end up beginning and ending with what we do. But, what we did is rarely as interesting as understanding why we did what. And, a great way to set that up is to start with what matters to you and tie the rest of the story to those themes. Even a simple start like – “I enjoy solving different kinds of problems” can go a long way in helping people understand how you make decisions.

So, given this, my ideal structure would be –

• Start with why
• Explain your professional path in a way that ties back to starting with why
• Depending on context, add a few personal notes – hobbies, partners, etc.

The beauty about starting with the why aside is that it doesn’t just add purpose to why you did what you did. If the context is professional, telling people what drives you is a beautiful way to add a nice touch of personality to your introduction.

2. Practice delivering your introduction within 3 minutes – ideally 2.5 minutes. I think a general sweet spot time for great introductions is between 2 and 3 minutes. Any longer and you better be Steve Jobs-esque engaging. I’ve added a time limit here because it is vital you write your introduction out once and practice it. Great introductions take a ton of practice.

3. Test and iterate. Every time you introduce yourself, take a mental note of the feedback you see from the introduction. Are people excited to talk to you? Are their eyes glazing over? Do you radiate a certain energy when you do it?

Our self introduction goes from good to great over time and it is on us to be conscious every time we deliver it.