Author: alearningaday

Sheila was upset with her job. It paid well but she didn’t enjoy it. And yet, she needed the money. So, a change was out of question for the moment.

And hence, it was normal for her friends and family to hear her constantly complain about her unhappiness at her predicament. During one such complaint session, her dad took her aside –

‘Why don’t you complain about gravity?’
‘What do you mean?’ – she retorted
‘In many ways, gravity is a bit of a pain right. If it wasn’t for gravity, we could fly.. But the fact that it exists causes more inconvenience that we can imagine.’
‘But we can’t change that!’ – she responded exasperated.
‘Can you change the fact that you need to keep your job?’
‘No..’
‘Why don’t you think of it like gravity? Accept it for what it is. And move on.’

Often, the big reason for complaints and unhappiness is because we are stuck in a situation we don’t accept. Maybe thinking of these situations like we think of gravity would help ease the pain.
Besides, complaining is a bit like vomiting.. It makes us feel better but everyone else feel worse.

Here’s to thinking of gravity every time we have trouble accepting a tough situation this week!

A simple idea.. but potentially very powerful!

When a baby is born, the baby emerges bloody, dirty.. and it is the human reaction to clean it, bathe it, clothe it etc.

That got me thinking about all natural human ‘things’.

Sex is characteristically dirty, yucky, chaotic.

Love and relationships are, for sure, extremely chaotic.

Food is a characteristically dirty process. The making of food and the cleaning up are both very messy. Oh, and the consumption can potentially be very messy as well!

Play is naturally very dirty. Even those who escape ‘play’ in the normal sense of the word and head to the gym have sweat to deal with.

If companies are an essential part of human life these days, leading a corporation is incredibly messy as well. You are likely to be keeping board members and shareholders at bay while solving a plethora of people issues within your company and of course, dealing with dozens of personal crises at the same time.

Parenting is incredibly messy and chaotic as well, of course. Just ask your mom.

Thanks to rigid education systems, we are often tempted to ask for, and expect the same level of structure and predictability when we start living ‘real’ life. The reality, however, couldn’t be farther away. We are ‘made’ by our ability to deal with the chaos that life brings with it. The ones who make a difference are not those hanging around waiting for ‘structure’, they are the ones who are out there finding structure for themselves within the chaos.

That’s because they probably understand that structure and cleanliness is a personal need – it is a need that serves our desire to believe that things are ‘under control’, when they really never are.

Contrary to popular thought, I argue, it actually takes a lot of courage to embrace chaos. And then, of course, do what it takes to make us feel comfortable in the dirty, messy, yucky and chaotic process that is this wonderful life.

I walked into the Indian embassy passport services room last Friday to collect my passport. One step into the room and I could literally feel poison in the air and negative emotions in the general. Characteristic of Indian embassies all over, they were running 30 minutes late and people were upset.

There had been some delay on the part of the embassy and now that they were finally ready, they were announcing the passports slowly – 1 at a time. And he was going through a bad run – the guy announced 4 consecutive names that weren’t present, he repeated their names 3-4 times just to make sure. This only increased the muttering and annoyance.

And around then, one guy decided it was okay to hold the entire crowd up as he had a mistake on his passport.

9 times out of 10, I am sure this would have led to me withdrawing into my own shell, trying to keep myself busy and not let the negative environment affect me. That was not to be though.

Friday was a day that was very positive. And I wasn’t going to let the passport embassy ruin it. So, it was time to be proactive and take some action. I began by requesting the guy who was insensitively holding everyone up because there was an error on his passport to do so after everyone finished. (He refused and said he would let the counter guy decide! Luckily the counter guy caught on and told him so as well)

And then, every time someone wasn’t present, I let out a loud ‘Absent!’ like we used to do in our schools (in India atleast) every morning when our teacher marked attendance. A few loud ‘absents’ and ‘presents’ later, every one’s mood lightened. Within minutes, there were some jokes and very soon, smiles began breaking out. And then, a couple of others began crying out ‘Absent’.

Satisfied, I sat down and got down to typing out a blogpost (not this one, funnily enough) on my phone.

A few minutes late, my name was called out. And of course, I marked my own attendance with a loud ‘Present’ and as I walked up, I had the whole crowd give a cheer.. as more jokes and smiles ran out.

All well. Went home. Felt good.

Life is a game really. We can choose to play it and have some fun..or not. How often do we choose to play?

It’s a fantastic hour spent exercising and listening to a book. I call it the ‘Hour of Power’ because it achieves many things at once – makes me feel good about myself (exercise unfailingly delivers), gives me tons of energy to start the day and of course, gets me started with a book that generally gives me some food for thought and/or a new perspective on things.

This is the 3rd week in a row with 3-4 days of the ‘Hour of Power’. I hope to re-commit to it every single day.

The challenge every morning is the initial inertia to get out of bed. I’ve resorted to calling a close friend every morning at 6:30am so I give myself that additional boost.

Shouldn’t I be excited to wake up and do something that is both good for me and that greatly adds to my happiness? Apparently it takes a little more than that.

Human Nature. Go Figure..

Try and be a ‘Hero’. Be there for them when they need you. Care for them. Set a great example.

Be a mentor such that when they think of fairness, caring and integrity, they think of you.

Make that difference. It is the people we touch that counts.

And if the time comes when you receive a simple ‘thank you’ from them for making a difference, ask them to pay it forward. And then do the same with somebody else.

Our horizons would be very narrow if we had no mentors and no people to look up to.

There is only so much we can learn from our peers and immediate friends. Our ‘big picture’ view could often do with more perspective.

Build your own Board of Directors. And help others build theirs. Maybe you will be on their board someday.

In your first attempt, it may not change or impact them as much as you might expect.

But it sure as hell will change you in more ways than you can even imagine.

Worth a shot.

This will be soon shifted to a domain I own. Hopefully by the end of this week. A few more changes coming up both here and there.

The quotes will be now be on the Tumblr blog and so will additional YouTube links, links to other magazines etc.

Happy Monday! :)

I was reminded about the attacks thanks Fred and Joanne Wilson’s posts. Joanne’s, in particular, touched me.

As you would probably know from my post 2 days ago, I lost my Dad 2 days prior to September 11, 2001. And I vaguely remember watching news broadcasts of the attacks. Everything in the outside world did seem very irrelevant and disconnected then.

As time passed though, I found myself revisiting the incident particularly when reading ‘Leadership’ by Rudolph Guiliani, the famous Mayor of New York who led the city through the crisis. Very few events have the kind of impact on our lives that this event has had. I watched as America launched wars on Iraq and Afghanistan in their bid to capture Osama Bin Laden and wondered at times if such an approach was warranted. I also remember breathing a sigh of relief when Bin Laden was killed in April. Closure is always a relief.

I also remember the discussion I had with a friend about whether America had done the right thing in launching this global war. I remember not being sure.

And as if to remind me, The Economist wrote a lovely article titled ‘10 years on‘. I hope you read it. There is one line I would like to highight here.

‘And yet those who say blithely that it overreacted to the attacks of September 11th will never know how much more devastation the jihadists might have wrought if America had not pursued them into the mountains of Afghanistan and Pakistan, shredding their networks and forcing them into hiding.’


That was timely. May the souls who lost their lives rest in peace.

Mike was a star manager at his courier company. His management strategy revolved around one principle – His most important goal in working together with his employees was to help the employee figure out who he/she really is.

So, Mike always asked them to take the ‘Sunday Night Blues Test‘. Sarah was one such example.
If Sarah didn’t feel the stab of blues when she looked at herself in the mirror on Sunday night , she should ask herself – ‘Why? What is it about the role and what I do that I love so much?’

And if she did feel the stab of blues, she should ask herself – ‘What do I need in the current role to look forward to the week?’
And then, ‘Can it be improved upon or do I need to look elsewhere?

Isn’t that a truly amazing way of looking at work? What if our objective every week was to think about work as a way of figuring out who we really are? And then working proactively to ensure we are happy doing what we do.
The world would be a MUCH better place for it.. That’s for sure!

Here’s to testing out the ‘Sunday Night Blues Test’ this week!