Month: May 2015

7 years

It has now been 7 years since I wrote the first post on this blog on May 11, 2008. That was 3,452 posts ago. In that post, I wrote – “Hopefully, I will be able to keep up writing one a day.”

It was really a statement full of hope. There was no evidence I possessed the discipline to do anything with any amount of consistency – let alone every day. And, while I definitely missed a few days in that first year as I built the habit muscle, I’ve largely been able to keep at it.

I spoke with a member of this community a few days ago about this blog and the blogging habit. She asked if I had a process and I just shared that I made sure I wrote as a part of my morning routine. (That’s a guideline – on some days, like this one, I write the previous night) She then asked if I had a social media or promotion strategy for this blog – I explained to her that I had none. So, she said – “So, you just focus on showing up every day.”

She got that exactly right.

I didn’t believe I had the discipline to show up every day when I started writing here. I do now. In some ways, a lot of what I’ve learnt from writing these notes every day is that we regularly underestimate how much we’re capable of. We respond to this in a variety of ways – either we attempt to be content with low expectations or we respond by talking a lot more than we actually do.

I’ve learnt that, if we choose to apply ourselves, we can do a lot more than we think, learn more than we think possible and be better than we ever imagined we could be.

But, first, we must learn to show up.

Thank you for your support through this journey. Your support is a privilege.. and one I’m very grateful for.

Questions and tentative talk – The 200 words project

Here’s this week’s 200 word idea from Give and Take by Adam Grant..

Wharton researcher Adam Grant’s interviews with successful lawyers, sales people and executives on how they moved people led him to repeatedly find 2 common behaviors – asking questions and using tentative language.

1. Asking questions – In a study of optical sales people, Grant found that, while unsuccessful staff try flattery and assertive talk (“I think the designer had someone like you in mind”), successful sales people ask the customer for their lifestyle, tastes, etc., before pushing forward a recommendation. They behave like opticians, not salespeople. Just the question – ‘do you plan to vote in the next election’ makes people 41% more likely to go if they weren’t planning to do so. Questions allow us to be convinced by a person we really like – ourselves.

2. Tentative language – Successful influencers were found to use caveats (this idea might suck), hedge words like ‘I think’, ‘maybe’ and words like ‘very’ that signal their lack of complete confidence. Such words were found to hold much more persuasive ground.

And, the underlying requirement? Good intent. Nothing could save someone whose intent was misplaced.

Questions and Tentative TalkSource and thanks to: www.EBSketchin.com

“Many times, you can have bigger impact if you know what to ask, rather than knowing what to say. I don’t learn anything when I’m speaking. I learn a lot when I’m listening.” | Jim Quigley in Give and Take

Working hard and offending people

I thought I’d channel some inspiration from G B Shaw for this weekend. Thanks to a wise friend for sharing..

“..this is the true joy in life — being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one… being a force of nature instead of a feverish selfish clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy. I am of the opinion that my life belongs to the whole community and as long as I live it is my privilege to do for it whatever I can. I want to be thoroughly used up when I die, for the harder I work, the more I live. I rejoice in life for its own sake. Life is no ‘brief candle’ to me. It is sort of a splendid torch which I have a hold of for the moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it over to future generations.”  | GB Shaw

There are so many interesting things about the quote. Especially, the idea of “the harder I work, the more I live.”

Sam Altman, from Y Combinator, had a wonderful post on how the days are long but the decades are short (thanks, Sam, for sharing). One of his points were –

On work: it’s difficult to do a great job on work you don’t care about.  And it’s hard to be totally happy/fulfilled in life if you don’t like what you do for your work.  Work very hard—a surprising number of people will be offended that you choose to work hard—but not so hard that the rest of your life passes you by.  Aim to be the best in the world at whatever you do professionally.  Even if you miss, you’ll probably end up in a pretty good place.  Figure out your own productivity system—don’t waste time being unorganized, working at suboptimal times, etc.  Don’t be afraid to take some career risks, especially early on.  Most people pick their career fairly randomly—really think hard about what you like, what fields are going to be successful, and try to talk to people in those fields.

I’ve found Sam’s point about “a surprising number of people will be offended that you choose to work hard” to be very true. Many unfortunately view work as a chore. It can be, of course, but it definitely doesn’t need to be the case. It becomes a chore the moment you view it as a means to achievement. Then, it becomes all about minimizing the amount of work necessary to achieve what you set out to achieve. However, if you do things that flow from a sense of purpose, it doesn’t feel like work at all. You don’t yearn for “balance” because none is necessary. It just becomes a fluid continuum of things you enjoy and a state of “balancing” and constant prioritization and re-prioritization among these priorities.

Contrary to popular belief, we don’t find happiness when we achieve. We find happiness when we pursue ideas and goals that we find meaningful. Success and happiness ensue from that pursuit.

And, that’s where real joy lies..

Appreciating gravity

There was a moment in my 15 minute meditation routine this morning when Andy reminded me to appreciate gravity. A part of the exercise involves being aware of the weight of the body on the chair and the weight of the legs on the floor. And, of course, that wouldn’t be possible without gravity.

I thought the idea of appreciating gravity was symbolic of many a good thing in life. Gravity, to me, is one of those things that does its job every single day and, yet, is conspicuous by its absence from our attention. We take it for granted.

There are so many things and people in our lives that are exactly like gravity. An example that comes straight to mind is the human body. Every part of this incredible system just does its job. We only realize and appreciate this when we fall sick. How about appreciating it every day while we’re healthy?

It is also incredibly pertinent when it comes to appreciating people. So many companies and teams take their people for granted – especially those silent warriors who plug away at what needs to be done with unerring consistency. Often, true performers function like gravity. While they’re around, we never realize the impact they’re making simply because we take it for granted. If they weren’t around, these things would happen, wouldn’t they?

Let today be gravity appreciation day then. As we move through the day, let’s think about the many forces, things, and people we take for granted.. and appreciate them. This isn’t so much about them. This is just about us building this habit – to observe what is really going on, to notice efforts that might otherwise go unnoticed and to appreciate the good things.

For, when we learn to be appreciative, we learn to be thankful. And, when we learn to be thankful, we learn to be happy.

The only sure-fire way to get fit

Spend time with people fitter than you.

Too often, we look for quick fix solutions like diets and intense bursts of fitness focus. The simplest way to solve this in the long run is to simply make sure you consistently spend time with people who care about fitness. It won’t be long before you mimic their fitness regimes and find yourself making more time to get fit.

We’re hugely influenced by the company we keep. So, if you want to get smarter/wiser/better, choose company that is smarter/wiser/better.

We are no more than the average of the five people we spend most of our time with.

Optimizing proxy measurements – MBA Learnings

In our Operations Management class, we discussed how Wilson tests the durability of its tennis balls. It does so subjecting them to pressure and checking for signs of contortion in the shape of the ball. It isn’t possible for Wilson to put each ball through hours of tennis hitting and then confirm it is ready for sale. So, it works with a proxy measurement. It is unclear if customers can tell the difference between a tournament standard ball and a non-tournament standard ball. Perhaps professional tennis players can.

There isn’t necessarily an issue with this proxy. It seems to have largely worked out okay for them. But, it is a proxy measurement nevertheless. And, it is foreseeable that there might come a day (if it isn’t already here) when the distance between the proxy and the needs of the customer grows and Wilson fails to adapt simply because it is optimizing for the wrong thing.

Proxy measurements such as the Wilson durability test are critical in Operations. Proxy measures are critical in our life’s operations, too. They’re our attempt at simplifying a complex world and making our lives easy to navigate. As I was thinking about proxy measurements, venture capitalist Fred Wilson had an incredibly insightful (and timely_ post today around using entrepreneurs using valuations as a scorecard on his excellent blog. In Fred’s words –“When you set out to build a great company, it’s hard to know how you are doing along the way. There does come a time when you know you’ve done it. Apple, Google, Facebook, Amazon, Salesforce, Tesla, etc got there. We know that. And the founders of those companies know that too. But two years in, three years in, four years in, it’s hard to know how you are doing. The market moves quickly. Customers are fickle. Competition emerges. Trusted team members leave. Your investors flake out on you. And so on and so forth. So entrepreneurs want something they can hang on to. They want a scorecard. A number. Validation that they are getting there.”

He notes that valuation is that scorecard. This idea is perpetuated even more so these days when financing and the valuations are reported every day as the most important news items in the tech blogs. And, then, he describes the dark side from decades of experience as a leading venture capitalist –

“This obsession with valuation as the thing that tells you and the world how you are doing has a dark side. And that is because valuation is just a number. Unless you sell your business for cash at that price, valuation is just a theoretical value on your company. And it can change. Or you can get stuck there trying to justify it year after year all the while doing massive surgery to your cap table to sustain it. 

And the markets can move on you and one day you are worth $2bn and the next day your are worth $500mm. Did you just mess up by 75%? No. The market moved on you.

The message of this post is don’t let yourself get sucked into a world where a number is your measure of self worth. Because you don’t control that number. The market does. And some days the market is your friend and other days it is most decidedly not your friend.

Measure yourself on whether your employees are happy. Measure yourself on whether your customers are happy. Measure yourself on how much free cash flow your business is generating. Measure yourself on how your brand is known and appreciated around the world. Measure yourself on how your spouse and children feel about you when you come home from work each day. You control all of those things, at least to some degree.

But please don’t measure yourself on valuation. It might make you feel good today. But it won’t make you feel good every day.”

Fred’s post beautifully illustrates the issues with proxy measurements. It is easier to treat income and a job title as a measure of success or a valuation as a measure of our self worth. It is much harder to identify and measure the things that actually matter – happiness, love, and so on.

But, beware what you measure. Because, what you measure will be what you optimize for.. and the worst outcome is a life spent optimizing all the wrong things.

The nature of competition

Competition is a funny beast. We all engage with it at nearly every stage of our lives – as kids in school, as employees in the workplace, as companies in the market place, and so on.

There are lots of theories around what it really takes to be competitive. I think the challenge with competition comes down to one core idea – what helps you compete in the short run is not what’s going to help in the long run.

And, understanding this idea is precisely what innovators and creators get right. They abhor the idea of playing in the rat race. Instead, they focus on creating the next thing and starting with a blank slate. It doesn’t always work. But, when it does, it is pretty magical.

This has a couple of interesting implications in our own lives –
1. It is okay to compete for something in the short term. But, pouring all your energy and resources into a short term competition is counter productive. You might win the proverbial battle but will lose the war.

2. That said, if you can avoid short term competition, do it. The best way to compete in the long run is to actually not engage in any short term competition. And, you soon realize that the only worthwhile competitor in the really long run is yourself.

3. The beauty about competing with yourself is that you soon realize there is nothing to be gained by viewing people around you as competition. In fact, the only lens with which to look at people (or organizations) around you is whether they are potential partners/collaborators or not.

And, that brings us to the final idea – how do you effectively compete with yourself? By starting on a journey of continuous improvement. The only measure of progress that matters is that you’re solving different kinds of problems this year than you were last year. And, the only score that matters is whether you’re better today than you were yesterday.

Influence and concern

Great books gift us with frameworks that give us ways to make sense of the world. Stephen Covey’s book, the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, attained legendary status because he managed to weave in a collection of great frameworks to help us think about productivity and life.

(Source: ExperienceLifeFully)

Great frameworks are beautiful in their simplicity. And, there are few simpler than the idea that we all have a circle of influence and a circle of concern. The circle of influence is simply a collection of everything we influence (e.g. our response to situations) vs. the circle of concern which is a collection of everything we don’t influence. And, the way of those who are proactive is to spend time within their circle of influence.

I’ve found an interesting truth in dealing with the circle of influence idea – the more time you spend within it, the more it expands. And, the more it expands, the more you realize that you can have a go at most problems you care about by just focusing on what you can do about them. You also realize very quickly as to where your effort is best spent depending on how much of the action feels within your control.

This is what the smartest people and companies do. As a growing company, for instance, there are many many things outside your control – competition and regulation are two simple examples. It can get overwhelming thinking about all the things you don’t control. So, focus fully on what you control. It is similar in our personal lives – there’s no point focusing on all the external stimuli that make up our day. It has to start with us – our actions and our responses.

Simple idea. Powerful implications.

Kite strings – The 200 words project

Here’s this week’s 200 word idea thanks to some awesome anonymous storyteller and a hat tip to Vik’s blog for sharing the story.

A son was watching his father fly a kite. After some time, the son said – “Dad, that string isn’t allowing the kite to go any further higher.”

Hearing this, the father smiled and broke the string. The kite went higher for a while and then began to come down and, eventually, fell to the ground. The child was very disappointed as he saw his idea fail.

The father took the opportunity to share a life lesson. He said – “Son, in life, when we reach a certain level of prosperity, we can often feel that there are certain things in our life that are not letting us grow any further. These things can be home, our values, our culture, our existing friendships etc. We feel the need to be free from those strings as we believe they stop us from going higher. But, remember, going higher is easier than staying at that higher level. Often, it is precisely our friends, family and values that help us stay stable as we experience the highs of our achievements.”

Source and thanks to: LinkedIn Pulse

And one to make you smile – ‘If you ever want to call a family meeting these days, turn off the WiFi router and wait in the room where it’s located.’ :-)

The bigger accident superstition

I have a little superstition that someone (I think it might be my mom) once passed on to me. I was told that every time something bad happens, it is a gift because it is a sign that something much worse has been averted.

So, when I damaged my computer keyboard 2 weeks ago by spilling water all over it, my immediate reaction was to thank the heavens that it was only my keyboard. According to my bigger accident belief, it was a small accident that was far better than something worse, i.e, spending $200 to replace my keyboard vs. having to replace my entire laptop.

This little belief goes a long way in easing many a painful situation by simply transforming it. While I naturally think about what needs to be done to fix it, the pain of a situation is immediately replaced by a sense of relief that it wasn’t any worse. That sense of relief is accompanied by a third person’s perspective – I realize very quickly that most of my problems are simply first world problems. They may be painful but, in the big scheme of things, all is well.

And, when you learn to see misfortunes as temporary and, thanks to this weird little belief, even positive, I have found that you appreciate the bumps and bends in the road. They’re just a sign that all is well.

As they say, a bend in the road isn’t an end in the road… unless you fail to take a turn.

PS: Thanks mom (or whoever that good Samaritan was) for sharing that idea.