A Learning a Day

:)

Happy Thursday!

Note: Post for Singapore residents only. Apologies to everyone else..

Just a note for all Starhub users in Singapore, subscribing to the 018 service by paying $5, we are entitled to international calls to a group of countries (all of Asia-Pac as well as US and UK) at local call rates/free if you have sufficient local minutes.

Singtel has a similar service. Just FYI.. I didn’t know this existed till recently. :)

Generally, a card castle in motion is a sign that something small has just unbalanced the whole castle and it’s just about to fall undoing many minutes (typically) of hard work. Try as you might, it is going to fall – you can’t do much.. maybe you can choose to smile..

It was a similar day. I’ve realized by now that things don’t go wrong in isolation. They go wrong, one small thing at a time. It all started by waking up early.. to a long list of things that were just skewed.

Now, it so happened that I was taking the MRT home when I decided to call a close friend back home thanks to Starhub 018 (coming up.. :)) and we were discussing the entire day and laughing about it. Right after this, I had gotten off the MRT and was walking towards the bus stop to take the bus back home when.. you guessed it.. it left just as I reached!

And this time, I called my buddy again and we were in splits at the situation.

So, that’s what it was – a day which was definitely not one of my best, but which ended with some laughter at the circumstances..

As it is rightly said – ‘Some days you are the pigeon, and some days you are the statue’. :)

Have a great day tomorrow!

There was a time not so long ago when the biggest thing that I would have held against myself was being very soft on myself. Basically, I was willing to compromise on my own expectations of results of any kind and ‘go easy’..

Now, there are times I wonder if I am on the other extreme – if I’m too hard on myself when it comes to certain aspects that I feel I stand for?

I’m not sure if there’s a good or a bad, I’m not even sure if I’m just at that stage of growth when you tend to alternate between extremes before finding a balance..

But, it’s still something on my mind. When it comes to formal attire, it is said that it is always better to be over-dressed than under-dressed. Is there a similar equation when it comes to this?

:)

Have a nice day!

I’ve been spending a lot of my time (about 1 and half hours a day.. sometimes more) switching between buses and MRT’s etc but contrary to what I’d’ve expected, I’m finding myself recharged after a trip because the following happens –

1) Reading – Normally, I used to push 30 mins a day of reading but nowadays, I do an hour and barely feel it.

2) Call home/other people I like talking to: And talk undisturbed – no email popping up in front of me!

These are the 2 big things that are adding so much value and joy! Oh, and there is one more –

Calling Starhub customer service – you get entertained by the beautiful waiting music and the awesome voice of the lady saying ‘Our customer service executives are still busy. Please hold the line or try again later’.. This typically takes 45 mins as well..

So, there you go! :)

Many things people strive for are actually byproducts of what the real goal should be. But by focusing on the byproduct instead of the goal, the desired byproduct is ever elusive.

Let’s look at a few examples:

Happiness

The real goal is finding activities you’re passionate about and consistently engaging in them.

That definition skews towards work, but consider spending time with people you enjoy being around an ‘activity’ and it can encompass romance and family time.

Becoming “Networked”

Lots of people want a big network, full of powerful influential people, but if you focus on that is the end goal it’s probably not going to work out very well and you’ll come off as very insincere.

Having a large, powerful network is the byproduct where the end goal is helping other people, building relationships or trying to make an important vision happen that others can get behind.

Making Money

Making money is a byproduct of focusing on creating value.

If you focus on making money, you might end up making a lot if you’re very driven, but if that drive was applied toward how you could create the most value, you’d make a lot more money.

The one caveat with making money is that it only captures the economic spectrum of “value”, but a lot of people are working on how we can measure other kinds of currencies and make them more fungible so that in addition to financial capital we can measure things like social capital and emotional capital.

Confidence

I can’t become more confident by saying to myself, “C’mon Max, be more confident”.

Confidence is a byproduct of being really good at something, which is only obtainable through practice and repetition.

Though often people can practice and practice and not improve. That’s why people will tell you, “practice doesn’t make perfect. Perfect practice makes perfect.” While that’s directionally correct, a better answer is “practice in pursuit of perfection will allow you to increasingly approach perfection and achieve excellence”

Conclusion

The list goes on and on of things that many people try to achieve directly but are actually byproducts: Enlightenment, Love, Creativity, Status, Success, etc. etc.

It’s not wrong to want byproducts, but they are not things we can get, in the capacity we want, by focusing on achieving them directly. Byproducts are the rewards we get for living our lives the right way.

And by recognizing how byproducts break down into corresponding end goals it becomes clear there are no short cuts. When we care about other people, other people care about us. When we create value for others, we are rewarded financially. When we do amazing work, we gain respect. To live a rich life where we are happy, financially abundant, surrounded by amazing people and confident in our own abilities, requires cultivating curiosity, persistence, self-reflection, self-discipline, compassion, character, drive and many other esteemed traits.There is truth in the words that our external reality is a manifestation, or a byproduct, of our internal reality.

I encourage you to look at the things you want, and figure out what’s a byproduct and what’s the actual end goal that you should authentically commit to.
—
Thanks Vikram for the link and Max Marmer

Have a nice day! :)

The line by the US commentator when the USA were seconds away from a miraculous victory over the legendary Soviet Hockey team in 1980..

If you haven’t watched the movie ‘Miracle’, I recommend you see it when you can..

3 wonderful things that struck me –

1) It’s all about conditioning. Herb Brooks (the coach) assured the team that while they may not be the best in the world, they were sure to be the most conditioned.. and they were.

2) Prepare, prepare, prepare: From day 1, the US team were assembled for just 1 mission – get conditioned enough to beat the Soviets in the Olympic games..

3) The name on the front is far more important than the name on the back: For all of us who are part of schools, companies – isn’t this a lesson for life?

:)
Have a great day! And yes, I do believe in miracles..

“Nietzsche was the one who did the job for me.

At a certain moment in his life, the idea came to him of what he called “the love of your fate.”

Whatever your fate is, whatever the hell happens, you say, “This is what I need.” It may look like a wreck, but go at it as though it were an opportunity, a challenge.

If you bring love to that moment—not discouragement—you will find the strength is there. Any disaster that you can survive is an improvement in your character, your stature, and your life. What a privilege! This is when the spontaneity of your own nature will have a chance to flow. Then, when looking back at your life, you will see that the moments which seemed to be great failures followed by wreckage were the incidents that shaped the life you have now. You’ll see that this is really true. Nothing can happen to you that is not positive. Even though it looks and feels at the moment like a negative crisis, it is not. The crisis throws you back, and when you are required to exhibit strength, it comes.”
–
Wow!