Category: Everything else

There’s been a lot of activity on this blog since Friday night thanks to the post on Bill Gates. I have been posting these blog posts on Hacker News for a while. Hacker News is a news aggregator and essentially, if the circumstances are right, your post could become a superstar post for a day.

That was the case with this post. And the impact was massive, make no mistake. The average numbers on this blog are 150 unique visitors (according to Google Analytics) + 170 odd feed readers and email subscribers. I estimate that to be 250-300 readers a day. And the comment thread generally reflects that as well. The most popular posts have about 10-12 comments.

Hacker news changed this for that post. It’s fascinating to see the impact. The post had about 90 comments, 39 reactions and I was wondering what the visitor count would be.

There you go – ~11,000. (the highest before this was 520)

And that brings me to the point of this post. I was having a short chat yesterday with an important member of this community. He remarked that this post had given this blog quite a readership. And I remember discussing with him the difference between readership and page views for a post.

Real readership would be retaining a small portion of these visitors for the long run. To all our new members, welcome! I hope you enjoy your stay.  :)

This post was an outlier. However, it made for an amazing learning experience as always. Aside from being called ‘gay’ by one commenter, I was screamed at by quite a few and was also asked to examine my values by a couple. I was reminded how difficult it must be to be a child star, having to deal with intense criticism at a very young age. That’s what I realized with Steve Jobs as well – a lot of his crazy neurotic behavior came from the fact that he was in the spotlight at a time he wasn’t ready for it. And dealing with this bashing every day definitely requires a strong set of values and sense of self.

I still remember the early days of this blog. Putting yourself out there is so damn difficult. When people critique your writing and point of view, it feels like a direct attack on you. You feel naked and exposed. And you always remember the ones who critiqued you, conveniently forgetting about the many that did actually have nice things to say.

Luckily, this time, I was ready for this kind of attention. I’ve learnt not to take critiques overly personally. And watching seasoned bloggers like Fred (in particular), Joanne and Mark handle comments on their blog has led me to develop my own style. But, it was interesting nevertheless to be the object of intense criticism – even if that was only the case for a day.

I posted this experience in a comment on AVC and had a couple of interesting replies. Fred said ‘Welcome to the jungle’ (he would know..) and another regular LE sent me a link to this article by Mike Arrington that resonated.

Any blogger will tell you how frustrating the early days are. Getting someone, anyone, to link to you. Your first comment! etc. And as your audience grows you are introduced to the first rule of anonymous human behavior – it’s dark and brutal, and reminds me how thin the veil of civilized behavior really is. If there is something nasty that can be said, someone will say it. Over and over.


A big part of blogging is simply keeping the peace. You set rules on whether or not you’ll allow anonymous commenting, or commenting at all. You decide if/how to moderate comments. You decide if/how to respond to opposing arguments and (more often) personal attacks. And you, involuntarily for the most part, evolve your writing in response to the feedback loop. Those are the days of innocence, simple joys and simple sadnesses.


And this led me to think about the whole concept of Building Fires. I replied to one comment with a quote I’ve posted here before..

There are 3 types of people in this world – some light fires, others tend to them and then there are those who spend their life pissing on the fire. Avoid them at all costs.

JLM’s quote stood me in good stead yesterday. I also realized something different. It takes a fire lighter or a fire tender to be the bigger person in any conversation or argument. It is so easy to criticize, so easy to give advice, so easy to gang up on a person’s idea or execution and make them feel stupid – essentially, it is extremely simple to piss on the fire.

But, the ones who have played their part in lighting fires or tending them know how hard it is to actually go out there and ‘do’. To build is hard. Because the way the world works, you will have opposition even before you start building. And once you begin, you will have many around you letting you know the truth and tell you that you will fail.

But, that’s the way of things. You will always have people pissing on your work and ideas. That’s half the fun, in truth. It would probably be boring without them.

On this blog, and in specific that post, however, I tried hard to let the pissers know they are not welcome in the comments. This is a place for anyone and everyone who is building or tending to fires, or wants to build or tend to fires. Here, we make mistakes. We say a few wrong things once in a while. But we learn. And we are always encouraged. Never shot down. If you are searching for negativity and gloom, then this is not the place for you.

And to all you ‘fire’ people reading this, a passage from Theodore Roosevelt came to mind.

Man in the Arena by Theodore Roosevelt

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.


—
The naysayers often have good feedback for you as well. One of them pointed out that the quotes weren’t very readable. I’m experimenting with a highlighter in this post. Do let me know if you have other suggestions.. 

1. Do I give more than I get? How much do I ask of others and how much do I give? And in what situations do I find myself ‘giving’ more?

2. Am I consciously building something special? If so, what am I building? What challenges am I facing? What am I learning?

3. What are the most meaningful learning experiences in my life right now? What am I learning from them?

I’m still reflecting on the answers. The answers to questions 2 and 3 are pretty fascinating. They weren’t entirely what I expected.

There were a couple of posts that got me thinking about this. Brad Feld had one ages ago that I stumbled on about giving more than you get.

Seth Godin had an insightful thought this week about building, a post on the difference between Math and Arithmetic. And it ended with this line that stuck with me.

It’s harder to create an original tweet than it is to retweet. It’s harder to find metaphor than it is to work through a to do list. Hard work, true. But worth it.


And, finally, a wiser friend of mine and I were discussing our most meaningful experiences of the moment and our biggest trials. So, I do have half my answers to question 3. The answers, by themselves, were pretty fascinating. Definitely not what I expected.

All these made me take a step back and reflect.

We make our way through life searching for answers. At work, it’s answers to the problem of the moment. In our social time, it’s answers to what would make us happy and what would make for nice experiences with people we love. In our spiritual/philosophical time, we are looking for answers to deeper questions about life and it’s meaning. We’re constantly seeking – from people and life, through our questions.

I just thought I’d flip it around today.

And ask myself a few questions. Give before I get, after all.

Have a nice weekend, folks. I’d love to hear of your reflections/questions that inspire you in the thread.

There were a couple of line in Coursey’s article that rang very true.

All that money you think Gates stole from you? He’s giving it back, with interest, to the world’s poorest.
All that money you think Apple has overcharged people? Apple still has it and Steve got and kept his share.

Steve Jobs has fittingly had a long list of tributes. He was among the greatest technologists, businessmen, marketeers and charismatic leaders of our generation. He was to CEO’s as the late George Best was to football – the first pop star.

However, there’s been an unfair amount of Bill Gates bashing that’s been going on on the side. Especially with Jobs’ new biography. Now, Bill Gates needs no defending whatsoever just like Steve Jobs didn’t need any additional tributes but I’m going to launch into a staunch defence of the great man purely because there are so many lessons in here.

Gates has been the man easy to hate just as Jobs has been so easy to love. Steve Jobs was the maverick, the showman, the obsessive genius while Gates is the boring anti-technology nerd who copies people’s ideas and makes money of them.

Now, I can’t say I’m the biggest fan of Microsoft’s products. I think Steve Jobs definitely got the concept of ‘shipping’ spot on. I love my iPhone and wouldn’t trade it for anything else. I love Windows, too, though and primarily because it is excellent for collaboration and the world practically runs on Windows. It’s credit to Bill Gates that that has happened. Microsoft’s goal was to put a computer on every desk and thanks to Gates’ leadership and vision, they actually have. I have never been a fan of Microsoft’s business practices but, that said, Apple’s aren’t much better either. For excessive use of lawsuits on one hand, we have a closed app store on the other.

But, the biggest reason I feel Bill Gates is the man to be idolized is because of his work ethic and humility. He is known to be a voracious reader, an extremely hard worker and has constantly carried himself with an incredible amount of humility for what he has achieved. Make no mistake, he is still Superman. A lot has been made of late of Apple overtaking Microsoft in terms of market cap. Mike Arrington puts this in perspective when speaking of Jobs and Gates as supermen–

Bill Gates was the co-founder and CEO of Microsoft, building it to an astounding $470B market cap. Under him, Microsoft had multiple acts, among them: DOS, Windows, Office, and enterprise server software. Since Steve Ballmer became CEO, the company’s value has declined to $223B. I’m sure Steve Ballmer is a smart and passionate guy, but he’s no superman.

In short, I am a huge fan. And always will be.

That said, he just went up many notches when I read this bit of news.

ABC news asked Gates of his view on Jobs’ criticism in his Biography.

“Bill is basically unimaginative and has never invented anything, which is why I think he’s more comfortable now in philanthropy than technology. He just shamelessly ripped off other people’s ideas.”

“When you think about why is the world better today, the Internet, the personal computer, the phone, the way you can deal with information is just so phenomenal…Over the course of the 30 years we worked together, he said a lot of very nice things about me and he said a lot of tough things. I mean, he faced, several times at Apple, the fact that their products were so premium priced that they literally might not stay in the marketplace. So the fact that we were succeeding with high volume products, including a range of prices, because of the way we worked with multiple companies, it’s tough. So the fact that at various times, he felt beleaguered, he felt like he was the good guy and we were the bad guys, you know, very understandable. I respect Steve. We got to work together. We spurred each other on, even as competitors. None of that bothers me at all.”

I liken the evolution to doing interviews. I remember my first experience as an interviewer in my 2nd year of university in our little start up. I clearly remember being so excited that first session that all focus was on myself and not on the candidate. I was constantly wondering if I was sounding credible to the candidate and behaving like a seasoned interviewer would. All this meant that the interviewee was secondary. It really was more about me than him.

Dozens of interviews later, I learnt to relax. And slowly, it turned to be more about the interviewee. Over time, I was self aware enough to see more hints that were coming my way and feeling at home.

We go through this learning curve in almost everything we do. Driving and leadership comes to mind. When we begin learning driving, we tend to give our cars a really bad ride (especially, if it is a geared vehicle). And when leading, our first followers likely had hell to pay. Mine did, certainly. God bless them.

It’s been similar with blogging. The learning curve, however, has been longer. In my first year, it was all about reminding myself to look for a learning every day. In the second, it was being disciplined enough to blog about it. And in the third, it gradually come down to picking the most significant and blogging about it. And now, it’s evolving to see the bigger picture. The attitude/comfort is in place. Now, I can spend more time on the real thing.

I’ve said this a few times now but I’ve come to realize that a blog is like a coffee shop/bar/meeting place. And the blogger is like a host. Very naturally, there is a community of people around it who visit every day. Some visit once a week and some less regularly. But, to the regulars, it’s an institution of sorts. You tend to like that regularity. You tend to like that bit of dialogue and even, debate. I’ve seen this most at AVC and BothSidesoftheTable, also at TheGothamGal. When I started visiting these blogs last year, I used to go for the purpose of reading. It was similar with blogs of my friends. Over time though, I realized that there are few things I enjoy as a blogger as to see comments and discussions. And keeping the Golden Rule in view, it is but expected that I do the same.

So, over time, I’ve made it a point to comment every time I read a post. At my friends’ blogs, I’ve requested for Disqus (versus the extremely unfriendly built in comments at Blogger, WordPress) and have tried to engage. At AVC and the like, I’ve seen myself become one of the regulars and I love the dialogue and debate. It’s a wonderful way to spend breaks at work. Instead of mindless surfing, there’s some intellectual stimulation. The brain is like a muscle after all, and it’s nice to give it some varied exercise. Besides, like in a pub/coffee shop, it’s nice to see some friendships develop with people from very different backgrounds.

This is a huge evolution in my thinking, though. It’s resulted in a huge change in behavior. Now, I find that I hardly ever read to take in but also to engage. And, in the process, I realize I give back, even if it is just a little bit. There are places I choose not to engage as well. The Harvard Business Review blog is one of them. There is so much of people and blogger bashing that goes on that it doesn’t feel like a place I’d like to share my own views as often.

The key in maintaining a culture of dialogue and debate is to keep it open, welcoming and civilized. And, bloggers and readers alike, have a huge role to play in making that happen.

Besides, wouldn’t it be a pity if most of the discussion (and debate?) of our time takes place under photos of people on Facebook?

As always, I welcome your thoughts. :)

Essentially, it’s a problem I avoided. Book-a-day used to be a constant unchecked task on my task list until a week ago.

I didn’t avoid the problem on purpose, I must add. It always felt like I had more important things to do and it was always easier to check a task like Blog or Blessings-a-day versus Book-a-day. I had no idea what I was supposed to do about it anyway. There’s a lot of very good literature about unclear to-do’s and this was the mother of unclear to-do’s.

It was 2 weeks ago that I finally realized that I was running out of time if I wanted to finish the book, as I had hoped to, by the end of the year. December was bound to be a busy month and taking such factors into consideration, I realistically had until the end of November to finish.

Holy cow. I finally had to face the problem. There was no way around it.

I realized that I was not resisting the writing but the task of sitting down and reading the 10 written chapters. I never read on my computer. How did I expect to get this done?

But then, I did read on my phone. So, now, I had to get it on my phone. A bit of research told me that the Dropbox app was perfect for reading stuff on my phone. Perfect! All my files are on Dropbox anyway (I’d done this earlier this year to save myself the trouble of any backing up).

And ever since mid-week last week, I’ve finally been able to get to reading my previous chapters. All inspired, I even penned down the epilogue chapter on the train and I’ve now dedicated my morning’s journey to my book. If I can get through the reading of all chapters by the weekend, I think I would be very inspired to get a lot of writing done when I’m away from work and email on Saturday evening. And yes, I’m very happy.

All that said, one part of me does feel like banging my head on the wall. The real problem was never the book. I’ve always wanted to finish writing it and I’ve always had the energy for it. The real problem was to find a tool that would enable me to read previous chapters when I wanted. Essentially, all these months, I was 1 app download away from making progress.

Relentless focus on removing obstacles and finding the real problem. That’s all I needed. We often get stuck not because we lack the energy to do a job but just because we lack the environment or the tools that would enable us to do it. And all we need to do then is to use our ability to think to enable ourselves to do just that. The rest will happen. And that begins by defining the real problem in the first place.

When stuck, define the problem.

A ‘Duh’ moment.

High time I learnt the lesson. 

Techcrunch was founded by leading blogger Michael Arrington who was recent fired from Techcrunch by their new owners, AOL thanks to reported conflicts of interest with a new investment fund that he founded recently. Michael popularized Techcrunch with his ‘I don’t give a sh*t’ style of writing and inculcated that culture amongst his team as well. Now, Michael has started blogging on his own blog called Uncrunched and I wanted to draw attention to a part of his first post.

He writes of the 3 things to expect from him and after Transparency and Truth, he writes about Bias –

– BIAS: I have lots of it, and I never try to ignore it or hide from it. The main thing to know about me is that I’m a champion of entrepreneurs and the startups they build. They are my rock stars. If in doubt I side with them, and that’s clear from my writing. For more on this, read my pirate post and mythoughts on how government can best help Silicon Valley.

I found this bit very fascinating. And I started reflecting on where my biases lay. And I really like the way he demonstrates his biases by saying ‘If in doubt, I side with them.’

I realized I naturally have many biases as well. And they naturally stem from ideas/ideals that I believe in. What I would find scary is if I didn’t have any biases because I would assume that means I don’t feel strongly about anything..

I have a natural bias towards ‘doing’ and ‘doers’, towards entrepreneurship and entrepreneurs, towards books and advancing our education, towards leadership and management primarily in reference to ourselves, towards family and the importance of having a steady personal life, to living below our means, to self discipline and persistence, to inspiration, to principles and values, to risks, failure, openness and to a search for understanding of ourselves.

I naturally favor experience and action over speculation. Almost every learning written here has only been brought in here after I’ve tried and experienced it. That’s why this blog will only ever be as experienced (or good) as I am. That’s the way of things. In a previous comment thread, I had a very kind comment from AbCarl who also request a post on Careers. I admit that one is long overdue but again, I find myself inadequate to shed any light on this subject when I haven’t been able to figure it out for myself. In time though, I’m hopeful it would happen.

And I also realize I truly believe in the power of a learning a day. I believe there will come a time when schools educate their students on this philosophy as a way of life. There are limits on what we can do career wise depends on where our talents lie. I can never dream of being a professional basketball player because I just don’t have what it takes. But, I can definitely believe in my ability to keep learning, try, fail and eventually find where my talents do lie.

Make no mistake, a learning a day assumes failure. But in that, it is unflaggingly optimistic. It assumed that you have stumbled, and not fallen. And that the stumbling will be the making of you.

It’s with these biases that I operate. Over time, my beliefs on some of these may change but what won’t change will be the fact that there always will be strong biases. And I always welcome you to challenge them in the comments as many of you do from time to time because I also value openness and I’m looking forward to the discussions. Besides, there are few things that get me going as much as some good spirited debate.

We live and we learn.

The purpose of education is to replace an empty mind with an open one, after all.

That said, as Arrington put it..
Ok, now that we’ve got that stuff behind us, let’s do some blogging!

Indeed. 

A group of 100 Stanford students were first identified, based on past behavior, as either charitable or uncharitable i.e. as saints or jerks.

Next, half of these students got a basic letter – bring canned food to the booth at the Tressider Plaza.

The remaining got a detailed letter with a map to the precise spot, a request for a can of beans and also asked them to pick a time when they’d be near the spot so they aren’t inconvenienced.

2 weeks later, the results studied were as follows-

For the basic letter – 8% of the saints donated. No jerks did. They were so far living up to their reputation but the saints weren’t doing much better either.

For the detailed letter – 42% of the saints donated and so did 25% of the jerks.

Isn’t this incredibly inspiring? A little bit of detail and specificity got 25% of the most uncharitable students to donate to the drive.

Bottom line – If you are hungry, you are better off relying on a jerk with a map than on a saint without one. :D

Another illustration of ‘What looks like a people problem is often a situation problem.‘ Chip and Dan Heath identify shaping the path as a key part of the change process. Eg: Setting up our gym clothes along with a glass of water next to our bed will likely increase the probability of hitting the gym.

Here’s to clearly describing the path to change this week!

It is Saturday evening. It is one of those rare times in a week when I get to spend some time on a blog post. And it’s nice to be able to begin it differently. There’s a whole bunch of topics waiting to be blogged about but I’m ignoring all of them.

I’m just enjoying the moment a little bit here. This is in contrast with how blogging is done rest of the week. On most days, it’s done in the morning after exercise and before work and on days when I don’t manage to wake up, it’s done after work in the evening. In either case, it’s not relaxation in the traditional sense as I’m either looking to head to work or end the day and go home. So, posts tend to be relatively short and to-the-point and thanks to feedback from many of you, I realize that suits you, as well. We’re all busy after all.

This, of course, wasn’t the case before the long and short form partition. I only wrote a long post when I felt like as I had a quote to account for the learning for the day. But, in truth, I haven’t ever been happier about the blog before that decision was made. It pushes me a fair bit but it’s another case where the juice feels worth the squeeze.

So, today, I thought I’d take a different approach. I started typing this with no topic in mind but I’ve gradually come to one I feel most passionate about at the moment – The Pursuit of Happyness. I also thought I’d let myself ramble a little bit. It’s been a beautiful day. I played a 90 minute football game in bright sunlight in the morning, had a nice afternoon nap and woke up in the evening and can feel the temperature has steadily been getting colder. As I write this, I’m sitting contented on Saturday evening enjoying the thought of an entire weekend to myself. And, of course, I’m away from email and work till tomorrow morning. So, I thought I’d take some time and enjoy some writing.. As a result, I expect this to be long, very long. I have a lot to say, haha ;-).

And I hope you’ll enjoy reading it as much I’ll enjoy writing it.

I was on a Skype call with a friend I was getting to know. I asked him questions about his background, family, his dreams and long term goals. And of course, he flipped all of those back to me.

I answered the question about my long term goals very differently from times in the past. I have ideas of what I’d like the future to look like. Some ideas are around coaching and teaching while some others involve crazier stuff like owning Manchester United (when I have a few billion in lose change, of course.. haha). Today, however, I found myself reflecting on the past year and telling him about a different approach I was taking for a little while. And I also reflected that a large part of the past 2 years has been on the pursuit of happyness.

I distinctly remember a question I asked myself two years ago – When am I happy?. It was August in 2009 – my start up adventure was over. I was now just a university student looking for a job that I would hopefully like. A whole new world. Of course, at that point, finding that job was top priority. But, really, what made me happy? I remember a few answers coming out then – staying in touch with close family and friends, reading books and sharing learnings, doing something meaningful with the time I have, playing sport, being of help to those younger than me who could benefit from a bit of mentorship and guidance (especially since I’d promised someone who had spent a lot of time with me that I’d pay it forward) and lastly, but importantly, having ‘enough‘ money. Enough is, of course, tricky. But I’ll come back to this later. Oh, and I also remember that I sought daily inspiration. (which, as I understand is normal for ‘N’ types in the Myers Briggs Types – I promise a detailed blog post on that as soon as I finish that (incredible) book)

The biggest realization, for me, then was that my happiness seemed to revolve around a clutch of small things. And as the process was naturally iterative, the next question was What can I do about this?. A few things happened over the next month – I started sending a close bunch of friends smses with daily ‘Good Morning’ quotes (SMSes were cheap on the student plan!), began writing one email 3 times a week to a very close friend and Mom (Tuesday/Thursday/Sunday Hello) where I rambled about the little things in my life, began sending these poor bunch of close friends a ‘weekly book learning’ as a way to force myself to read something of value, playing football 2-3 times a week, working with some younger friends thanks to activities I was involved in and spending quality time on weekends with friends.

Suddenly, the world seemed different. I’ve mentioned this many times before but having spent all of 3 years trying to make a venture work meant that I had attached all my self worth to it. That’s why calling it off was incredibly hard and the period after that was harder. That period was an intense time as we went through the ‘2nd year’ of being a serious start up and realized things wouldn’t work out. And it wasn’t for lack of effort. We had all learnt lessons for life and it was time for us to pick the pieces and move on and find our own different paths.

I vividly remember my happiness levels slowly go up. It was the 1st semester – I wasn’t regular in most of these things but slowly, they became habitual. ‘Good morning’ quotes started showing up here and at that time, solved a major problem as I wasn’t disciplined enough to blog a learning every day. I remember the ‘Hello’ emails happening without trouble but the rest was a struggle, including football. There’s something about being a university student. Even though we have lots of time, there always seems like there is none of it.

The next phase was understanding how I could make this regular and habitual. I realize this also a function of the ‘J’ type. And as I’d read a very inspiring book that spoke about finding coaches and making little systems, I began experimenting with that. Here again, as in many many points in life, I had a mentor leading the charge and showing the way. I have learnt SO much from people older and wiser who have taken time to help me. I always promise to ‘pay it forward’ but I sometimes wonder if I will ever have the kind of impact they’ve had on my life and thinking. And that was the beginning of a points system where I tried accomplishing a certain bunch of things every day and I lost a dollar for every point I missed (big money as a student) to a close friend, who was my ‘coach’. I used to meet him every sunday discussing my plans for the next week, performance for the last week etc.

Those days used to be a constant wrench. A real struggle. I didn’t have that kind of discipline. 30 minutes of book reading every day was unthinkable. I learnt a lot. Slowly, I began to settle into that and actually began habitually doing the little things that made me happy. I could feel the difference. My relationship with my Mom and close friend became so much deeper (I felt the difference when I was back home), my younger friends added an incredible amount of joy in my life, my curiosity was being stoked by all the great I was reading, I was beginning to feel inspired by the quotes and learnings and my own attitude was slowly becoming worthy of this blog’s philosophy. I also got lucky – I found work I would enjoy at a place that seemed perfect for me and things began looking up.

Soon though, university was over. I remember the next phase being that of the GMAT but I also remember continuing to do these little things. Happyness. I was beginning to feel it.

And then, of course, work life began. This was a tough transition again. I was doing all these little things – how could I keep them up with a full time job? I began learning to say No to a few things. My discipline systems ensured accountability and soon, I was feeling settled. Then, the travel phase began and I began trying to wonder if I could keep up this energy in spite of constant changes of location. I learnt that we can do anything we want as long as we ask ourselves the right questions and stay true to ourselves. Over time, this list has increased to counting blessings, reading the news, playing games on Lumosity :), sleeping 8 hours, writing to more and more friends regularly and so on – every bit bringing with it more learnings..

Thus, the past year has meant a lot more of these little little realizations. A few things about life never change – there are ALWAYS ups and downs. It’s gotten to a point where I’ve started laughing at unexpected downs because I’ve half expected something funny to happen right after a really cool up. The challenges also never stop but that doesn’t mean it’s an excuse for me to do any less. I’ve been amazed at the human capacity to ‘do’. The more I do, it seems like the more I can do. And the harder I work, it seems like the luckier I get. No hard work has ever gone waste. Because, over time, the dots connect. Always.

Of course, there have been tons of mistakes on the way – many many Mea Culpa moments in every little project. And I’ve also learnt that with more growth comes responsibility. This blog has been proof. A recent incident comes to mind when I pissed someone close to me off unintentionally thanks to something I said here. It felt bad. Really bad. But then, you live and you learn. Failure makes you humble. Attempts at stuff don’t come without failure of course. Reminds me of a football league I signed up for with a bunch of friends 2 months ago here. We are so out of depth that we concede 10 goals a game(!). It was very demoralizing at first but I’m learning to be a good loser. In fact, I’m learning more from the football experiences thanks to failure after failure after failure.

Along with all of this, I can feel a real thirst to understand myself and how I fit in. That’s why the excitement about Myers Briggs and personality types. I remember this quote that ‘life is such that you can get out of it knowing more about others around you than yourself’. I’ve realized that I’m only accepting of people and situations around me when I accept myself. I find myself hungry to understand how we work, why we work they way we do and that hunger has led to me devouring books. A quest to stay hungry, stay foolish..

I’m beginning to realize many of the basic ways of the world thanks to these experiences and books that escaped me in the past. I find myself more respectful of tradition and admiring the little things because I’ve found them contributing more to my happiness than anything else. Of course, money matters. Here, I’ve found the $75,000 to happiness most useful as a goal.

I’ve realized the importance of letting go, in the little things. A laugh, for example, in a sticky discussion or situation goes a long way in smoothing things over. I’ve greatly reduced trying to win discussions with sarcastic/’smart’ comments.. because you never really win. That’s incredibly hard for a heady competitive person to understand especially when you love debate and competition to stir up some emotion and adrenaline.

I’ve also begun to accept (slowly) natural cycles of productivity and energy. Some days you are the pigeon, and some you are the statue. Also seeing time and time again that everything that happens happen for the good. Learning to laugh at them more and probably, most importantly, laugh at myself a lot more. Trying to speak slower, smile more.. all the little things. And trying to keep my child-like excitable self while not being childish.

Learning to ‘let go’ has been a tough tough battle. Given ever changing schedules and travel plans, I used to fret endlessly about my holidays, trips back to Singapore etc at this time last year. Now, I’ve switched off from these worries that are beyond my control. I realize they more or less tend to work out. And if they don’t – so what? The fact that I have such choices means I have it really good. There’s no reason to complain..

And, at this point, I’m loving this stage and process. A lot of what’s going on now is character building. And I believe it’ll have tremendous impact in the years to come – if not as somebody who makes a difference in the world, atleast somebody who makes a difference to my kids and people I come in contact with. I’m not clear what lies ahead but I trust it’ll come to me when I’m ready. Life is an incredible teacher. And the teacher can teach only when the student is ready. And I’ve realized life doesn’t do free advice.

I joke with a friend that, as a kid, I was close to ADHD. Always trying many things and improving breadth without necessarily going down in depth. That has changed with time. I realize I’m beginning to see the deeper meaning behind the philosophy of this blog. When this journey began, this blog was almost a diary where I document learnings. I was too scared of criticism so I blogged under the acronym of ‘Every Day I Get Better’. Over time, I’ve learnt to accept both ends of the stick and learn to laugh at the low points and at myself. That’s not come easy. It’s amazing how we naturally focus on the negative because, along with the mistakes and low points, have also come so many words of encouragement from those who read this. It never fails to inspire me. I’ve begun to realize that learning every day is way of looking at, and living life. And, as a result, a large part of the past year has been a quest to be worthy of the blog in many ways by focusing on the upside instead of all the things that went wrong.

That, really is, the story of the journey over the past couple of years. It’s been an incredible journey filled with learnings from people, books, experiences, highs, lows and failures thanks to the best teacher of them all – life. I’ve dug deep in this one and I realize I’ve been writing for an hour now. But, what an hour it has been.. this is another one of those little things that makes me happy.

The Pursuit of Happyness – it really is a journey, a pursuit defined not by answers, by questions. And an amazing one at that because every positive act we do as a result of being happy has a tremendous ripple effect around the world. The Butterfly Effect. Amen to that.

Isn’t that amazing? I find myself smiling as I’m writing this. And it’s nice to be sure that it’s probably going to make you smile as you read this as well. :)

Smiling thus, I will call it a day. There’s a beautiful few hours of Saturday evening to be enjoyed. And as always, there’s tons to be thankful about and so much of life to enjoy. It’s amazing how good we have it – just to have working vision and hearing to be able to take the world in.

A big part of all these learnings has been the responsibility that comes with the good. But I’m hopeful that will happen. And I’m hopeful it’ll all be worth it. As Steve Jobs would say..

It will. I hope. I believe.