Author: alearningaday

Have you ever had your patience severely tested?

I must admit that it has been a very long time since I’ve had my patience severely tested.

I have made it a point to bring it up from time to time (which is in my nature) but the results haven’t been close to expectations. I guess that comes from the part of me that expects things to go as per plan.
But today, when I walked into the same situation and felt my temper rise, I decided to let it go.
I heard from a (much wiser) friend I worked with that he was learning to let go of many of the basic assumptions he worked with in a new environment and every time he found a situation difficult to handle, he said to himself – ‘life is probably trying to teach me something here.’
That’s my conclusion as of today. Life is probably trying to teach me something. And I’ve decided to be a good student and let go.

The Paradox

Back in university, it was always a case of more time and less insight.

I remember days when I used to rack my brain for a good learning to share.
Now, I have a potential blog roll that is growing uncontrollably, but a seeming lack of time to spend time and post them.
Maybe I am ‘growing up’?
Most things in life are a paradox, I realize. When you have lots of money, you have less time to enjoy it and when you have lots of time, you have less money.
Life. A long tight rope walk. The biggest paradox of them all.

On Finding Coaches

John Mcgrath asked himself a simple question – Picture a top sprinter/athlete by name Tom. Why does a top athlete like him need a coach?

When he put himself in Tom’s shoes, he realized that the main reason to hire a coach was not to learn anything new but to help keep up his discipline. Tom’s coach would enforce a rigorous schedule and ensure Tom stuck to it. Simple things like waking up every morning can be very hard after all! (as we all know well!)

John, being quite the ‘discipline’ person, enforced this rigorously in his own life. He got himself a ‘coach’ – a close friend with whom he met/spoke every weekend to plan his week, set his goals for the week (or month) and de-briefed. He attributes the ‘coach’ insight to have played a big role in his success as a millionaire real estate entrepreneur.

Having read the book in December’09, I got myself a ‘coach’ as well around this time last year. And I can testify to it’s impact!

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The magic of ‘Inshallah’ – Note: This post is non-religious

I took many many lessons from my 4 month stint in beautiful Oman. One of the biggest of them all was the magic of ‘Inshallah’.

My Omani friends (bless them) say ‘Inshallah’ from time to time. Inshallah literally means god willing. And it is typically used when talking hopefully about events in the future.
I’ve found this to be very practical. Here’s how.
Imagine you meet a relative/friend down the road. This is a relative/friend you don’t necessarily know very well but is generally nice and warm. It turns out that you are home only for a few days each time and somehow, the relative/friend is never high enough on the priority list for a special separate visit. (let’s face it.. we can’t be everywhere!) It gets VERY tough when they ask for a promise ‘Next time you make it, you will come home right?’
Now, if I made such a commitment and didn’t manage to live it up, it would eat me. So, my options in the old days were –
1. Smile – Wasn’t very effective but worked sometime..
2. Laugh loudly with an ‘I’ll try’ – Pretty effective with people who don’t persist
3. Give an excuse/Complain – I hated doing this but again, tended to work

All these worked with varying levels of successes – This trip however, I say ‘Inshallah’. And it is the perfect answer – God willing (God, being the excuse). The reason is that I don’t want to say ‘No’ but neither do I want to say ‘Yes’. Who know? Maybe I will be overcome with the urge to visit this friend/have coffee with the relative.
Somehow, it also feels less offensive. And to those who feel it is too religious for your taste, you can of course modify it to a version that suits you (Inshaganesha/Inshajesus?).
Thank you Oman. You’ve added a lot of happiness with this learning. And most importantly, now I choose which commitments I say ‘Yes’ to. After all, it’s important you don’t say ‘Yes’ when you want to say a ‘NO’.
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Once again, I would like to reiterate that this post is non-religious and is not intended to offend anyone. The spirit of the post is that ‘God willing’ is a nicer and more practical way not to dig holes in our lives by over-committing. Apologies if I have offended anyone.