I saw this short clip of the Argentinian football (“soccer”) team players celebrating their victory against Brazil in “Copa America” – the South American variant of the Euros.
A few seconds in, we hear one of the players begin singing a song that makes fun of Brazil. Lionel Messi – Argentina’s star captain and arguably the greatest player of all time – stops him immediately. “No no” – he nods vigorously as he walks away.
Even after winning the final against Brazil Lionel Messi stops De Paul of singing a song which makes fun of Brazil.
It is a powerful moment for many reasons. It speaks to the importance of leadership in reinforcing culture. By immediately saying no, the Captain made it clear that “this is not how we do things here.”
Messi also underscored a simple idea – we can celebrate constructively. Enjoying our own victory doesn’t have to include mocking someone else’s failure or defeat. It is an idea that is easy to forget as we go through our lives – especially in competitive endeavors.
Finally, it is a reminder that money and success do not guarantee class.
And that is exactly what that was – a moment of class.
There was a fascinating article about giant goldfish being found in lakes around the United States.
Those innocent looking fish grow to between 0.2 to 0.6 pounds in a tank. But, when fish owners dispose them in the wild, they can grow up to 30-40 times bigger. Here is an example.
Here’s another example to get a sense of size.
As is the case with species that aren’t part of the natural ecosystem, these goldfish are invasive and end up messing with the ecosystem within these lakes. Disposing these fish in lakes is now illegal in many states.
A few months ago, there was a remarkable paper posted about the influence of the 2019 wildfires in the Amazon on global climate. While deforestation was thought of as the only contributor to these fires, the researchers showed that climate analogies originating in the Indian ocean likely was ~40% contributor to the problem.
This is a particularly powerful finding because deforestation in the Amazon causes climate anomalies all over the planet. When said climate anomalies come back to affect the Amazon, it speaks to just how connected the global ecosystem is.
Deforestation in the Amazon is a particularly sensitive global issue because the Amazon used to be one of the world’s largest carbon sinks. However, that is sadly no longer true. In an ingenious study (paper, article), a research team studied the Carbon dioxide and Carbon Monoxide profile of parts of the Amazon between 2010 and 2018. And, they’ve found that the South Eastern Amazon is now a Carbon source rather than a Carbon sink.
That’s both the powerful and challenging thing about understanding ecosystems – especially that on our planet. Things are more connected than we think. There’s more nuance than we think. And the balance is more delicate than we think.
I’ve been thinking about the word “transformation” recently. It means “a thorough or dramatic change in form or appearance.”
It reminds me of a quote about learning – “To learn and not to do is not to learn.”
So, learning inspires change. These changes are often small – most learning, after all, is done incrementally.
But, learning also compounds. With compounding, small steps effectively become leaps over time. Continuous learning thus results in dramatic changes over time.
That right there is the recipe for transformation in my mind.
It is tempting to think of transformation in people and organizations as a dramatic event.
Of course, that might happen. But, odds are that it probably won’t.
We’re far better off betting on continuous learning instead.
Milwaukee Buck’s star Giannis Antetokounmpo was asked about how he keeps his ego in check despite his many accomplishments at age 26. Here’s an excerpt from his answer:
“When you focus on the past, that’s your ego: ‘I did this. We were able to beat this team 4-0. I did this in the past. I won that in the past.’
When I focus on the future, it’s my pride: ‘Yeah, next game, Game 5, I do this and this and this. I’m going to dominate.’ That’s your pride talking. It doesn’t happen. You’re right here.
I kind of try to focus on the moment, in the present. That’s humility. That’s being humble. That’s not setting no expectation. That’s going out there, enjoying the game, competing at a high level. I think I’ve had people throughout my life that helped me with that. But that is a skill that I’ve tried to, like, kind of — how do you say it, perfect it, master it. And it’s been working so far. So I’m not going to stop.”
A focus on the past is ego, a focus on the future is pride, and a focus on the present is humility.
Every few months, I visit the nearby USPS post office to mail something. When I do, I often have a good experience. Each time, the person behind the counter requests me to scan the QR code and leave feedback.
I assume they’re incentivized for this and get the process started.
Each time – I think my recent attempt was the third – I drop off when I see a 6 or 7 step survey.
My behavior fits Einstein’s definition of insanity – trying the same thing again and expecting different results. But, some combination of hope and memory loss (given the time intervals between visits) compels me to try.
The lesson – keep feedback surveys short. They’ll actually get done that way.
A note for new subscribers: This post is part of a series on my notes on technology product management (this is what I do for a living). You might notice that these posts often link to older posts in the series on LinkedIn even though they are all available on this blog. That is intended for folks who only want to follow future product management related posts. Finally, for all those of you who don’t build tech products for a living, I believe many of these notes have broader applicability. And, I hope you find that to be the case as well…
A quick overview of what we’ve covered on “Notes on Product Management” so far –
Before starting this series, I spent a bit of time thinking about how I should articulate the core skills required to be a strong IC/individual contributor product manager. I had 3 criteria –
Clear/mutually exclusive: I wanted skills that would stand on their own and, for the sake of this series, wanted to avoid umbrella words that spoke to multiple sub-skills (e.g. empathy)
Memorable: This implied committing to no more than 3 or 4 skills to ensure they’re easy to remember
Actionable: This meant choosing “problem finding” vs. “product sense” because of the action it implies.
Soon, problem finding, problem solving, building effective teams felt right and were locked in. But, I debated whether to call the final skill influencing or selling.
I chose selling because it felt a bit uncomfortable. I wanted to reach into that discomfort and spend time there. In the first post on selling, we framed the persuasion process as a combination of Direct Marketing (content led) and Sales (human touch led) – surrounded by Brand marketing (the friction in the process is inversely proportional to our brand/reputation).
The next post focused on our biggest direct marketing lever – writing. Many subsequent posts have either focused or touched on writing – e.g. the ones on product specs and product strategy.
Today’s post will be focused on the other side – sales.
Why does the word “selling” make us uncomfortable?
I think there are many reasons. When we think of sales, many of us visualize pushy sales people who try to get us to buy something we don’t want. For some of us, it may even bring back memories of Alec Baldwin in Glengarry Glen Ross unleashing a torrent of verbal abuse on 4 salesmen while emphasizing the ABC of Sales – “Always Be Closing.”
No wonder sales feel uncomfortable.
To Sell is Human and the new ABCs of Selling
I felt similarly until I read Dan Pink’s book – “To Sell is Human.” Dan’s book transformed my perspective. He reframed selling by pointing to a simple idea – if you need to influence people as part of your job, you are in sales.
He also reframed the ABCs of selling. Two decades ago, the internet didn’t exist. This meant there was large information asymmetry between buyers and sellers. And, as online ratings/reviews didn’t exist, selling felt like a series of one-time transactions. Both of those aren’t true today. We walk into a car dealership with as much information as our dealer. And, the dealer cares about that Yelp review we leave.
That then brings us to the new ABC’s of selling – Attunement, Buoyancy, and Clarity. For the rest of the post, I’m going to translate how I think we can use the new ABC’s to reflect on and improve our sales skills in our role as Product Managers.
If you haven’t read the book, I’d recommend it. Here’s a quick visual summary in case that helps – hat tip – Jenny Trautman.
(1) Attunement:
Key question: Are we building trust in our relationships by seeking to understand?
Attunement is all about empathizing with others. Our ability to be attuned to a person follows from our willingness to get to know and understand them. The biggest implication is the importance of taking the time to get to know our partners. My approach to this has been to aim to start every relationship with an introductory 1:1 before jumping into ask/work.
Knowing the story of that cross-functional partner helps us understand them as we begin working with them. That understanding leads to trust in most cases (in other cases, it leads to mistrust – either way, it is important to know where we stand. :-)). That trust, in turn, helps us prioritize uncomfortable conversations and to be comfortable when we disagree. Uncomfortable conversations and disagreements are pre-requisites to progress.
Outside of cross-functional partners, the previous post on building relationships with Product Executives attempts to provide more structure on building empathy with our product leaders.
(2) Buoyancy
Key question: Do people walk away with more positive energy after spending time with us?
Implications for us: In every interaction, we exude one of 4 behaviors. We are either –
Condescending – expressing superiority
Critical – showcasing disapproval or criticism
Constructive – building off existing ideas to make them better
Proactive – moving things forward and making them happen
Each of these impact everyone’s energy differently depending on where they are in the process. In general though, the impact looks like this.
The ability to show up with positive energy regardless of the way the winds are blowing is critical to our ability to influence the people we work with. So, learning to be consistently constructive or proactive makes a huge difference to our ability to influence others.
It is important to call out that these are behaviors and not character traits. They become traits only when we consistently show up in one way. So, it is in our interest to choose and reflect periodically on whether we’re showing up as we intend. It won’t always work. Despite our best intentions, our intentions will occasionally be misinterpreted – especially when we meet with people who don’t know us. The goal is to keep increasing our ratio of hits to misses.
The interesting thing about these emotions is that they’re as applicable to others as they are to us. For example –
How do we feel when we spend time with ourselves?
Are we critical every time we think of a new idea or are we constructive and solution focused?
How does this change when we’re going through a difficult time?
That, then, is the true test of our buoyancy – how we feel after we spend time about ourselves. The more we walk away feeling positive after spending time with ourselves, the more likely others will feel the same.
(3) Clarity
Key question: Do we transform situations from ambiguity and chaos to clarity?
Attunement is about empathizing with our audience. This audience may be internal (our organization) or external (our users/customers). Buoyancy ensures we show up positively. Clarity, however, is the clincher – the key pre-requisite to closing the sale.
Everyone is dealing with more information and ambiguity than they know what to do with. So, the ability to consistently step into ambiguity and transform it into clarity is a core skill.
Transforming ambiguity to clarity is a 2 step process –
Frame: A complex set of information needs an organizing structure or framework. The best ways to learn how to frame is to spend time with people who are structured and read books or articles by people who are good at what they do. The ability to simplify complex information is a sign of skill. This post, for example, is an ode to Dan Pink’s ability to reframe sales as attunement, buoyancy, and clarity. The other way to teach ourselves to frame is to constantly ask – if I had to boil this topic down into no more than 3 things, what would I say?
Decide to simplify: Once you structure information, the next step is to decide what matters. The word decide comes from the Latin word “decidere” which means “to cut off.” The purpose of making a decision is to cut off options. So, when we decide what matters, we automatically simplify.
Attunement, buoyancy, and clarity, are each powerful in their own right. Attunement or empathy, for instance, is just as important in our ability to be good problem finders or problem solvers or even team builders as it is in our ability to sell. Buoyancy and clarity matter across the board too.
But, when we’re able to bring these three together consistently, we step-change our ability to sell. While sales is important to our jobs as individual contributor PMs, it becomes more important as we evolve our role from individual contributors to leading teams of product managers.
The good news is that selling is a skill. It is a muscle we all can get better at if we work on attunement, buoyancy, and clarity.
And, the good news – channeling Dan Pink – is that to sell is human.
For a period in my life, I spent a lot of time in close proximity with folks who generally left me feeling… stupid.
Maya Angelou once said that people don’t remember what you say or do but remember how you made them feel. As I think back to that time, I do remember many of the things that were said and done. But, I have incredibly vivid memories of how I felt.
The interesting thing about that time is that the more I felt stupid, the more likely I was to make stupid mistakes. And I did make more than a few. It was a self-perpetuating cycle.
I learned three lessons from those times.
First, I learnt to pay close attention to how I felt after I experienced people or things. There are times when some experiences don’t feel right. And, when it doesn’t, I ignore any and all attempts at logical thought and stay away. Feelings – especially those that originate in our gut – matter.
Second, I learnt to value people who appreciate what’s good about me over my flaws. Their feedback consistently focused on helping me improve my strengths while ensuring my flaws didn’t get in the way. It was generally constructive. In my experience, that is the most useful kind of feedback.
That is not to say critical people aren’t helpful or caring. In many cases, they might be one or both of those. That said, every once a while, these relationships just end up perpetuating a bully-victim cycle. In some cases, these critics inspire tremendous wealth/power/fame by virtue of ensuring we operate with a consistent sense of insecurity and a chip on our shoulder that never goes away.
That may be an acceptable trade-off for some. But, it isn’t for me.
Third, as a result of paying attention to feelings and valuing constructive, I have gravitated to environments where people I respect operate intensely to make a positive impact on the world – in the presence of safety and belonging.
That safety and belonging, in turn, inspires the kind of confidence that enables us to operate from a place of wholeness instead of our wounds. And, in places where people operate from wholeness, people leave feeling better about themselves than before more often than not.
They may (and likely will) often be faced with the realization that they have a lot to learn. They may not want to do so and might decide to leave.
But, they’ll never be made to feel consistently stupid.
