Month: December 2025

As I reflect on what I want to take with me from 2025, the single biggest change I’ve made this year has been around movement.

I’ve been writing about wanting to be fitter and move more for probably 15 of the 17 years I’ve been writing this blog – ever since I graduated from college. And it’s been so bloody hard to make meaningful progress.

But a combination of 3 books – Outlive, Good Energy, and Built to Move – have inspired real progress over the past two years.

Two stats from my Health app bring this to life:

(a) Exercise: In 2023, I averaged 39 minutes of exercise per day. This year, that number doubled to 78 minutes.

(b) Movement: Last year, I hit 8,266 steps per day. This year, that number moved up about ~60% to ~13,200.

The first bit of progress came from regular weekday workouts and soccer on the weekend. The step change in movement came from a lot of intentional walking – especially post meals.

I’ve definitely made significant changes to my diet. However, I think the biggest changes have been around movement and I’d love to take this with me to build on in 2026.

This is also a change that has brought me a lot of joy and day-to-day happiness. It reinforces the idea that we are, indeed, built to move.

It is also a reminder of just how hard it is to make this sort of change. It’s one thing to write about it for so many years. It’s quite another thing to actually do it.

And we can increase the odds of making that happen by stacking one small habit at a time.

A few weeks ago, I was reflecting on my own behavior at home. And I realized that if I stack ranked my level of patience, I was most patient at work. Probably just as patient – or maybe a little less patient – with my kids.

And the person who had to deal with me when all of my reserves were seemingly gone was my wife.

So in many ways, she consistently sees the worst of me. The most impatient side.

It’s never fun realizing something like this about yourself – when you realize that the person you care about the most is the one you show the shittiest side of yourself to.

The question that followed is – what stopped me from doing better? From, say, being upfront when I was really low on patience. Or simply being more patient.

The answer is ego.

It’s easier to pretend like nothing is wrong than to admit I’m behaving poorly. Even saying that would be a good first step on some days.

Over the past couple of weeks, I’ve been working on improving this – with some encouraging progress. Of course, it’s going to be a journey.

But the first step is simply leaving that pattern of behavior behind by holding a much higher bar for myself. That starts by being a lot more patient… also being proactive about saying when I’m not at my best.

I’m hoping to do a lot better in 2026.

There’s a great story about Sir Peter Jackson on the Hobbiton set of The Lord of the Rings. When they found the location for Hobbiton in Matamata, New Zealand, the central area near the Shire had a couple of apple and pear trees.

However, Tolkien’s Shire had plum trees.

So, Peter Jackson had his crew buy and wire plums onto the trees.

The scene with those trees lasted less than six seconds. There was no way anyone would notice the plums even. And even if they did, it’s unclear if they would have cared.

But Peter Jackson did. He wanted it to be true to Tolkien’s vision. And he cared enough to sweat the details.

So much of leadership is setting a high and clear bar. That bar, then, becomes the culture because “this is how we do things here.”

This was Peter Jackson setting that bar for the Lord of the Rings crew.

Brian shared this post recently on his (new + daily) blog. Philosopher Tyson said it well – it resonated.

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A year ago I watched this video of Mike Tyson, asked by a 13 year old about the legacy he wants to leave (source). I’m just going to leave his response here. It says it all.

“I don’t believe in the word legacy. I just think that’s another word for ego. Legacy doesn’t mean nothing. That’s just some word everybody grabbed on to. Someone said that word and everyone grabbed on the word, so now it’s used every five seconds. It means absolutely nothing to me.

I’m just passing through. I’m going to die and it’s going to be over. Who cares about legacy after that? What a big ego. I’m going to die, I want people to think that I’m this, I’m that. No, we’re nothing. We’re dead. We’re dust, we’re absolutely nothing. Our legacy is nothing.

Can you really imagine somebody saying, I want my legacy to be this way when I’m dead. You think they might want to think about you? You think I want people to think about me when I’m gone? Who the fuck cares about me when I’m gone? My kids maybe, my grandkids.”

Sometimes our role in life isn’t to judge something – it is to figure out how to fall in love with it, especially when it becomes part of our new reality.

The other day, I was in a conversation where someone was describing their new commute. The question that came up was, “Do you like it?” And of course, the natural instinct is to evaluate it: I don’t like this part, I don’t like that part, etc.

But if that commute is now your daily reality, what’s the point of judging it?

The only useful response is: “I’m figuring out how to fall in love with it.”

Because once something becomes part of your life – a commute, a schedule, a constraint – complaining about it doesn’t change anything. What helps is learning how to make it useful, meaningful, or even enjoyable.

It’s the same principle as complaining about gravity. It is futile.

Accepting your new reality is the first step to agency.

“At some point, everything’s gonna go south on you.

Now you can either accept that, or you can get to work. That’s all it is.

You just begin. You do the math. You solve one problem… and you solve the next one… and then the next.

And if you solve enough problems, you get to come home.” | Mark Watney, The Martian

While the consequences are generally not as existential as they are in the story, the arc is relevant in every attempt to solve a hard problem.

As a friend and I were reflecting about the end of a wonderful experience recently, this friend posed a two-part question – “What are you going to take with you, and what are you going to leave behind?”

I loved the premise of the question. Our approach to any experience is going to have aspects we should take with us to the next one. And, on the flip side, there are aspects we should consider leaving behind.

It is a question I’ve been thinking about in the context of the year that’s coming to an end (and it is, thus, the latest addition to the annual reflection list).

There’s a lot to unpack here and I’m looking forward to it.

The 10 question annual reflection is a longstanding ALearningaDay tradition. I recommend doing it in 3 steps:

i) Carve out an hour in the next week to “look back and look forward.” It helps to do this in a quiet place with no distractions or interruptions.

ii) Work with a list of 10 questions that make you think. For a starter list, I’ve shared the 10 questions I ask myself below (here’s the Google doc – you can just make a copy onto your Google Drive. Here’s a PDF if you prefer to print). I prioritize keeping my list simple – some years, I get done in an hour and in other years, I spend a few hours diving deep into a question or two. The important thing is not the length/depth, it is simply carving out the time to zoom out.

iii) Archive your questions and notes for next year. Check in with them over the course of the year and read them before you start next year’s reflection. Looking at what was top-of-mind a few years later is also guaranteed to make you smile. :-)

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10 Questions – Annual Reflection 2025

“Sometimes, we need to just take a step back and look back at how the pieces fell. When we do that, we see what was important and what never was.”

1. What are the top 2 themes/memories/moments I will remember 2025 for?
   
2. What were the 2 biggest lessons I learnt in 2025?
   
3. We learn from a mix of 3 sources – i) taking action and reflecting on our experiences, ii) people, and iii) books/courses or synthesized information. What did my mix look like in 2025?

i) Action + reflection:
ii) People:
iii) Books/synthesized info:

“Show me your schedule and I’ll show you your priorities.”

4. Looking back at how I spent my time in 2025, what were the top 2 themes/buckets x processes/outcomes I prioritized (Examples: Career – prioritized ABC project or getting a raise, Health – prioritized more outdoor exercise or losing 10 pounds)? Did what I prioritize align with what I intended to prioritize/were there any surprises?
   
5. What are the top 2 themes/buckets x processes/outcomes I intend to prioritize in 2026?
   
6. What are 1-2 things I’m going to take with me from 2025 and what are 1-2 things I’m going to leave behind?

“How we hope it works: Commit → Take action
How it actually works: Commit → Fail → Recommit x 20 → Fail x 20 → Recommit → Take action”

7. What do I most need to learn in 2026 and how do I plan to do this (habits/checkpoints, etc.)?
   
8. What have I got planned in 2026 to prioritize renewal and memorable experiences (e.g. holiday plans, weekend activities, hobbies)?
   
9. Health, close relationships, and money are foundational to the quality of our lives. What are my guiding principles or habits as I think of these dimensions going into 2026?

Health:
Close relationships:
Money:

“If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them.”

10. What is a set of 2-5 principles and/or values/virtues that I want to live my life by?
    [Note: These could include your notes from the previous question. Consider saving these on your phone so you can read them first thing in the morning. ]

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I look forward to doing mine in the next days. I hope you find this useful as well.

Be in the now.

It’s all we really have.

It’s always worth reminding ourselves that while we are the central character in our own story, we are, at best, peripheral characters in the stories of most people we interact with.

No point over-interpreting or overthinking reactions, silence, delays, or passing comments.

Most people aren’t paying as much attention to us as we are to ourselves.